This is a genius piece of work, and it deserves a much higher rating than a 5 - I am sorry about the situation with your aunt - Alzheimer's is a devastating illness - it will be great when they find a cure for it - I always believe education of these things it essential - and you have done this in an eloquent and dignified way. Your writing is impeccable, keeping the reader glued to their seat.
I give you a lot of credit for the work that you do. Parenting is a difficult job in itself, and foster parenting is even tougher. I enjoyed reading about your travails with your foster children. It was quite educational and very interesting. You expressed yourself eloquently and with a great deal of dignity. From a literary point of view, I think that this was perfectly written.
This is a great piece - I am so sorry for your loss - you have expressed your emotions so eloquently and with great dignity - from a poetic standpoint, it is sheer excellence - the rhythm and flow are perfect - and it makes it 'easy' to read - the formatting is great - the paragraphing and sentencing goes right in order.
The rhythmic sequencing of this poem is excellent - the fact that you centered the piece accenuates the feelings that you are trying to convey. Your imagery is sensational - I was visualizing life in paradise as you so described it and it sounded very interesting. I really liked this piece.
This song made me giggle - because of its political accuracy - I liked this piece a lot - it had a nice rhythm and a flow - the refrain is really good - and it makes the reader or the listener as the case might be, think. I would be curious to hear the music that accompanies this.
This again was a wonderful and moving piece - I am sorry for all of the pain that has been inflicted on you - but I commend you for your strength - I really loved the way you expressed the mother-son bond - that is a really special thing to have - you have expressed yourself eloquently and with great dignity - you have a real talent for writing about that that is so emotional and close to the heart.
What a profound story - exuding with emotion - and what a lucky child your son and his friend were to find each other - you expressed yourself wonderfully and with a great deal of dignity. Your imagery is profound - making it easy to follow the piece and visualize all that is happening in the story.
This is a great piece of work - I am sorry about all of your losses - it would be great if we could find a cure for cancer - that being said - you expressed yourself so eloquently and with great dignity in this piece. It was well written and 'easy' to read -I appreciated learning about you and your family - I have a true penchant for those types of works.
This was a nice poem - it reeked of emotion and had the reader empathizing with the writer throughout the reading - your imagery was senseation - and your usage of tough words was appropriate - I liked the formatting of the poem - in the way that you put the myself and I - just one typo - I think you meant its - not it's.
This was an excellent story - is it true? I was moved by the inspirational undertone in the piece - your character development was excellent - you followed your story, Charlie's and Evelynn's - and I could visualize these people and identify as well. The story was well written and easy to follow and very interesting - it was sad, but it had an important message to relay.
This was a sensational poem - its message was profound and heartfelt - I appreciated the religious undertone in it, as well as the true compassion that you show your enemies through your words. From a poetic stand, this was perfect. The rhythm and flow were just great, and the way that you formatted the poem was wonderful. My only comment is that I thought that you should not have been in a red hue - to me, and this is only personal, it changes the focus of the poem.
This was a great poem - its formatting was great - your punctuation and paragraphing were perfect in my book. Your imagery was great, being able to visualize the angel that you so describe. There is a great spiritual undertone to this piece that is very comforting.
I liked this poem very much - it was well formatted - good punctuation and paragraphing. I liked this imagery that you could visualize your conversation - it had a very spiritual undertone to it which I thought was very interesting and very emotional.
This is a cute poem - it has a nice flow and rhythm and you have sprinkled a sense of humor into it as well. The imagery is great = I can picture you doing all the things that you have described - I think though that you should have added some punctuation in the middle of the sentences (commas) and then started the line with a lower case letter. But that is only personal.
This was a nice poem. It had a good rhythm and exuded a lot of emotion. I could identify with you and your feelings and empathize with your pain. My comments are that in the first paragraph, you change tenses, some of the verbs are with 'ing' and some not. In the third paragraph, who are you walking with - I mean it is easy to assume, and often that is OK in poetry, but somehow it seemed dangling here. And in the last paragraph, I think you meant one.
I liked this piece a lot = it had that great family feel - warm and fuzzy - it was well written and fun and easy to read. The imagery was great - I could visualize all of the action as I was reading it. You even infused a sense of humor in it with the final line - which made me laugh.
I loved the title of this - so I had to read it - I am a big sports buff, so I could not understand what you meant - when I started reading your piece and realized you were then referring to feline olympics, I was amazed. I never thought that cats would compete in things - but I guess I was wrong. You presented this scenario in a wonderful way. It was extremely informative and loads of fun to read. It was well written and I truly loved the piece.
I loved this story - It had me glued to the computer to see what would happen. It had this great imagery that I could visualize Tom and his interactions with the customers. When the little girl says she loves him, I started to cry. This is a great story - I kind of was hoping for more - but I guess that is why it is only a short story.
This poem is wonderful - it reeks of sheer emotion - and I empathize with you with your pain. I am sorry for the loss of your sister (I am guessing that who is who commit suicide). I identify tremendously with the poem, as I feel like I have suffered because of my mother's demons and now have demons of my own. From a literary point of view, this poem is great - it has excellent rhythm and flow and great imagery.
My only comment, and this is only personal, is that the words that begin the lines that are mid-sentence should be lower case.
This poem reeks of true emotion - as a Jew, I identified with this poem immensely. Your word use was well thought out and it sent shivers throughout my body. Your dedication to whom I believe your father or grandfather is great and it increases the imagery - for I can visualize you talking to him.
My only comment has to do with your formatting. I fathom this is a poem/prose - given that - it seems that the sentence structure seems a little inconsistent. Some of lines just have a few words, leaving it part thought, when perhaps part of the preceding line should have been included in this to create a complete thought. With this change, I believe that this could be a perfect poem. I liked it a lot.
What a brilliant piece of work - this deserves so much more than a 5 - I give you my condolences on your loss - losing a child is probably the worst type of loss - but you are doing good so it seems from this eloquently written piece of work. It is amazing how the most difficult things teach us the most.
I really liked this poem - the emotions are strong and I could identify with it immensely. I loved the rhythm - it made the poem flow beautifully. I was curious though why in certain places you put certain sentences together on the same line. Normally, I am not crazy about that, but somehow it works here. Just one little typo - I think you meant chosen.
Kudos for a job well done, I look forward to reading more of your work.
I liked this poem very much - it had a great rhythm and flow and it exuded sheer emotion. I could identify with you and feel your pain. The formatting was good in that you paragraphed the poem appropriately - I was just wondering if there was a reason that in the beginning there were certain lines that ended with I - was this to accenuate the emotion? If not, I thought it sort of strange that it was there.
At the beginning of this piece I was thinking that maybe Jack Goldman had something to do with Lisa's disapperance, but after reading more, I realize that I am going back to my original hypothesis - that maybe it is Brian or P (I forgot the other slimeball's name)
This was indeed an intense poem - from a formatting point of view - I would say that you should have italicized the poem and regular printed the text - also, and I am probably all over the place with this, am assuming that the man in this picture is Jack Goldman - I am still convinced, and you have not finished the story, that they had an affair.
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