I thought that was extremely well written and very thought provoking. I've come across several "Quiet Ones" within my life and you're right "Won't you talk to him?" Yes! I found absolutely nothing wrong to make note of! Excellent work! Keep up the great writing.
Kris
I am finding your work to be well written and inspirational. I am going to share this one with my daughter who just graduated high school. I'm forever about going for your dreams while still being practical. But never letting them go and never giving them up. Thank you for sharing. Excellent work!
Although you write about a job. I have to agree that taking chances are the only thing that keeps us alive and happy. Letting fear get the better of us will only drag us down and make life miserable. You did a great job with this piece! Keep up the great writing!
Kris
The word "Dreams" caught my attention in your title, so I just had to read. You made me smile as I thought about what you wrote. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make. You did a great job and I hope you keep up the great writing!
Kris
That was beautiful! I loved it. Reminded me that for every single tradegy there is a slice of magic somewhere else. I don't think of those things when I curl up with my son to put him to bed at night or when he gives me a thousand kisses a day asking if he's given me one yet this week.
Thank you for sharing that beautiful piece. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have not one suggestion to make.
Nicely written. I thought it flowed nicely and gave a vivid description of longing. Made me think of a lot of things. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
A very interesting story. You held my attention and stirred my curiosity. I enjoyed how you increased the font. However, double spacing in not required between sentences. You could use only 1 space. Also a couple of your larger paragraphs could be broken down into two. However those are simply my suggestions.
Very nicely done, had me pulled in and completely waiting to see what happened. I found a couple of little things with spacing but nothing serious. You did an excellent job and I have to ask...is there another story as you mentioned at the end?
Very nice, I truly enjoyed reading this and couldn't wait to get to the end. I did notice some double spacing and a few minor things which are easily fixed, however it didn't take away from the story.
That was different and interesting. I enjoyed reading this piece and have a couple of suggestions for you, however remember these are only suggestions.
1. For dialogue you should opening and closing " not '
2. Watch for double spacing between sentences. Most you had single but there were a few where you had a double.
I'm sorry, I ended up laughing. I would have loved to have seen the look on Josh's face when he was faced with all those people at dinner. That would definitely teach him. Anyway, you've done an excellent job and I couldn't find anything wrong to make note of.
I thought you did a beautiful job on this piece. Excellent work. I enjoyed reading this and couldn't help thinking about the world today. I have two teenage daughters and a 4 yr old son. I would suggest reading through and changing a few "that" to "who". Read through and substitute "who" and see if it fits. I only found a couple.
Excellently described. Very peaceful setting, although the troubled oldest son. I would make note that only 1 space is required between sentences and the fourth paragraph could be broken down into two. To me it was overly long.
I thought you did a great job on this piece. I found only a few minor things. Mainly spacing and maybe a capitalized word in the middle of a sentence. Otherwise, you did a great job telling this story. I enjoyed reading it and you held my attention straight through.
Interesting. Very descriptive. You made me stop and think at your choice of words, tamer especially. I enjoyed reading this and I thought you did an excellent job on this piece. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
Nicely done. You held my attention throughout. However, I will recommend keeping an eye on your alignment. First you're indenting and then you stopped. I woudl recommend if you're not indenting to put a space between your paragraphs. Keeps it from running all together.
Interesting story. You held my attention throughout. However, I do have some suggestions. For your alignment, I would recommend keeping it the same throughout. Also, single space between sentences. Double spacing is not necessary.
A nice tale of history and makes a person think. I enjoyed reading this and I thank you for sharing this tale. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
Full of emotion and heart. You held my attention throughout. You did a great job on this piece and I have found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make. Excellent work.
I enjoyed reading this piece and was disappointed to reach the end. I thought you did a great job telling this story. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
I think you can expand on this if you wanted to, however, that's simply my opinion. I thought you did a great job with this piece and I enjoyed reading it. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no other suggestions to make.
I honestly have to say I think you could build on this, however, I thought you did a great job on this piece. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
I couldn't help it, I had to laugh. I thought of my 4 year old son and knew he would do something like that to me. Very cute!!! I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
WOW! Excellently written. You nearly brought me to tears. I don't know if I could ever do something such as that, takes a very strong couple of women to handle a situation such as that the way they did.
I thought you did a wonderful job on this piece. Eerie...to say the least, however, I believe things like that happen all the time. I found nothing wrong to make note of and I have no suggestions to make.
Keep up the great writing and Good Luck!!
Kris
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