*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/omniblueeyes/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/5
Review Requests: OFF
1,554 Public Reviews Given
1,950 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Previous ... 1 2 3 4 -5- 6 7 8 9 10 ... Next
101
101
Review of I love you  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE NEWBIE REVIEWE...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



I can feel the hurt and confusion in your words. they are a bit scattered but I think it is because you wrote this when you were intensely distraught and confused over the situation.

happend happened
Comming Coming

I am unsure what is happening in this poem. Is someone sick? I hope not. I see this as a prayer of some kind. I feel the raw emotion oozing through it.

Thank you for sharing and I hope it works out for you and him.
102
102
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE NEWBIE REVIEWE...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




Well they wont allow us to go to hell,
I think the word BUT would be better used instead of the word 'well' (just my opinion).

As a former wife of a long haul truck drive, I knew it was in his blood to be on the road. i could not stop him and he was an arse when he was home for too long. i understood his need for the road and supported him and his 'job'. That was the not the reason he and I ended our relationship, although distance can take it's toll. I think there is a place in heaven for truck drivers.

This poem was well written and I felt it from your heart. i thank you for sharing it with us.
103
103
Review of Traveling  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



Are you a long haul truck driver by any chance? This love of the road and understand of it reminds me of an ex I had who was a truck driver.

Your paint quite a clear picture of what being on the road can be like. I like the use of metaphor and simile in the story. You go into great detail and i appreciate and enjoyed the story.
104
104
Review of The Glory Of War  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



This is much like a story told in verse. It is sad to me how men are taught to be brave and aspire to go to war. It is an honor to fight for our country but a shame to learn in our young days what it might be like to kill. feigning death and actually dying is very different as I am sure you know.

news of the war (there is always a war
somewhere) with intense interest,
These lines read a little less smooth than I would have liked. i think it is the way it is broken up and also the brackets.

The rest of the poem was well done in its story telling. I appreciate the read and thank you for sharing!
105
105
Review of In my dream...  
In affiliation with Showering Acts of Joy Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



The poem is written for Pick a prompt where I believe the writer must choose from a list of prompts and prompt words. I think you did a great job using the words in this poem.

I am only concerned that in the beginning of the poem you are dreaming, by verse three you are awake and by the end you are suddenly sleeping again. I would consider having the setting of this poem take place in only your dream.

The use of simile is great and i think this poem could be tweaked just a bit to make it more 'finished' and also a little more consistent.

Thank you for sharing and Write on!
106
106
In affiliation with Showering Acts of Joy Group  
Rated: E | N/A (Unratable.)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



This is a poem dedicated to Rogue♥Sherri . Rouge read and awarded a very special piece of your 'work'. You wrote this ode to your friend in appreciation.

I think the poem is beautiful. The rhyme scheme is consistent and not at all forced. The flow was beautiful as were the words. *Heart* Nice and very sweet!
107
107
Review of Get Well Sherri  
In affiliation with Showering Acts of Joy Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



This message forum was created when Sherri was sick with pneumonia. This forum not only shows how much SherriG is loved around WDC but how caring and loving the members on this site are.

While Sherri is all better now, I am sure she would love to see new messages from her friends *Smile*
108
108
In affiliation with Showering Acts of Joy Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




"Simply Positive Newbie Reviewers"  is a brilliant group made by SherriG. The idea is to have a group of people review selected new member's work. You must sign up to join this fab group. You review selected newbies and any other newbie using the group signature and you are not only doing a good dead for a new member but also will be rewarded by the group for your efforts. I think this is an excellent thing as we would hate to lose any new member by not noticing them. Everyone joins WDC to share their writing and sometimes their soul with us.
109
109
Review of Lost  
In affiliation with PSYW  
Rated: E | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



This would be a very cute poem or short story for children if you added illustrations. i liked the message very much.

I do think you might want to look over verse three a little. The 'who's it' part made me stop and reread.

A great message of hope and love concerning a lost or perhaps abandoned puppy.

Thank you for sharing. I always enjoy my time in your port.
110
110
In affiliation with Showering Acts of Joy Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **



I would like to tell you again how pleased I am on your progress in not only staying clean but in your growth as a person. You have opened up and learned to love yourself fully. You embrace joy and happiness like no one else I know.

I think Stacylynn did such a fabulous job at creating this page of encouragement and love for you. I loved seeing everyone come in to support you. This was your day and you deserved it.

the page is still open if anyone is curious to take a look or add a message of their own for the wonderful Kristilove *Heart*
111
111
Review of Seventeen  
In affiliation with Showering Acts of Joy Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




This is a very heartfelt poem. I Think I know what it is regarding so that makes it hurt more when I read the words, but I think the words could be read by just about anyone and render them speachless. The words have impact on anyone who has experienced death.

I really like how you put the rhyme scheme together. Instead of rhyming within the verses, you made three stanzas with lines 2 of each three line stanza rhyme.

This was an excellent, moving, sorrow-filled poem.
112
112
Review of Respect  
In affiliation with WDC Frontliners Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I am reading this like it is the first time even though I have read it before. (there was a rating)

You talk about respect. It is not so simple is it? Respect is about honoring and appreciating as well. It is not a simple act, it is about being the best you can be in every way, wanting others to have the same and then sitting still and respecting all that was given. You have to respect not only the 'good' but the 'bad' things that happen in your life. Without one, you can not fully appreciate the other.

I really needed to read this again. I do not know what prompted you to edit it but I am thankful that i got the chance to read it again. It showed up at exactly the right time in my life. How neat! Seriously, it is kind of special and I feel blessed by not only you but by my God that I get to be reminded of my destination and my goals.

"End each day thankful for all the fulfilling enrichments accomplished. Look forward to each tomorrow with a sheer zest for life." Love it!
113
113
Review of Allure  
In affiliation with Rockin' Reviewers - Award ...  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
LOL I am back again *Smile* The roll of the dice picked me to review and gift you with a MB.

I looked in your humor section because I felt like I needed a laugh. I was reading this poem and thinking how magically beautiful it was, seeing no humor and wondering why it was in the folder. It was a very sensual poem. Rhyme scheme was wonderfully done per usual and the words were....well they were weaved together to create this picture in my head of lust and longing until...

The ending line

LOL! You realize that that last word does not follow the rhyme scheme *Wink* That just adds to the shock.

I loved this! A must read!
114
114
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! 🌕 HuntersMoon
You are receiving your review by special request. ~WhoMe???~ has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!

This poem is like you said, a mini story, but with a rhyme scheme and verses.

Reading it, I changed my mind a few times to what is music represented. At times I thought they represented a lover, other times I thought it might just be literally music he loved. I like the former meaning and reread the poem thinking of this lonely man creating memories and 'music' about a lost lover.

I think the true testament of a good poet is that he/she is able to write a piece where anyone can relate. The poem is not so literal that it can only mean one thing. This poem was written where I think I could come back at a later time and would be able to see myself reflected in your words and the poem would probably mean something entirely different to me.

I really enjoyed this mini story. Very, Very well done!
115
115
Review of Tribulation  
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! 🌕 HuntersMoon
You are receiving your review by special request. ~WhoMe???~ has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!

I am back! I could seriously read your poetry for hours. I was browsing and the description of this poem drew me in. I have been trying to stay positive in my life and find my inner strength. I knew this would be a good read.

The form you tried is fun. The Diatelle is always hard to get into the shape of a perfect diamond.
Not only did you have the form to follow (you did an excellent job) but you also had to add some prompt words to it. It seemed effortlessly done. I rated this perfect even though it was not a perfect diamond shape because it is not a requirement for this form to be perfect and not all Real diamonds are perfectly cut.

I really liked the message in the poem. We all have to chip away at times to find that diamond in ourselves. Adversity can cause us to stop 'digging' at times but we learn to keep persevering.

Thank you for sharing this beautiful poem with me.
116
116
Review of Inscriptions  
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! 🌕 HuntersMoon
You are receiving your review by special request. ~WhoMe???~ has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!


Form: Villanelle
The Villanelle is a great form for those who like to tie repetition in with rhyme. The lower case letters rhyme with ALL instances of that letter (capital or not), and the capital/number lines are refrains and should be repeated exactly as they appear in the first stanza. The stanzas are laid out like this forming 5 tercets and a final quatrain:
A1 b A2, a b A1, a b A2 , a b A1, a b A2, a b A1 A2

I had to keep myself from looking for the repeated lines, I 'felt' them but I kept wanting to see exactly where the repeated lines were. I stopped myself and allowed myself to just feel your words, rather than try and dissect them. I know the repeated refrains were there because all of the verses of this poem sounded so united when read out loud. The flow was beautiful.

LOL on the rhyme find! LOL I am glad you always give definitions of your words if you feel someone might not know there meaning. I always have to pull up my dictionary and look words up. I will not pretend to know a word.

This poem had a mysteries, beautiful aura. That is my quest: To smile and end each day with no regrets *Smile*

Thank you again for sharing! I think I will bookmark this one!
117
117
Review of Tribulation  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! 🌕 HuntersMoon
You are receiving your review by special request. ~WhoMe???~ has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!

I am back! I could seriously read your poetry for hours. I was browsing and the description of this poem drew me in. I have been trying to stay positive in my life and find my inner strength. I knew this would be a good read.

The form you tried is fun. The Diatelle is always hard to get into the shape of a perfect diamond.
Not only did you have the form to follow (you did an excellent job) but you also had to add some prompt words to it. It seemed effortlessly done.

I really liked the message in the poem. We all have to chip away at times to find that diamond in ourselves. Adversity can cause us to stop 'digging' at times but we learn to keep persevering.

Thank you for sharing this beautiful poem with me.
118
118
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! very thankful
You are receiving your review by special request. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!


A poem written by 'the other woman'. I am not sure if this is based on personal experience or just something you made up. Some of the emotions you speak of seem very real.

You stick to a definite rhyme scheme. I wonder if this poem could be elaborated on, filled in more. I just know you have more in that heart of yours to let out.

All in all, a good start to what could be a powerful poem!
119
119
In affiliation with PSYW  
Rated: E | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




Hi! SHERRI GIBSON

This is a beautiful poem about the reason people celebrate Christmas. It is an ode to Jesus Christ, celebrating his birth. The word choices were lovely. The poem told a complete story. 'I' felt complete after reading it.

The rhyme scheme was followed consistently through the poem. I wonder if you had a syllabic scheme you were following. I counted the 'beats' and there did not seem to be a constant pattern. The poem flowed beautifully, perfectly in fact, in some places. Just a couple times, I was stalled for a moment by the change in rhythm.

I think if you look at the poem and read through it again, perhaps you might agree with me. The rhythm 'issues' are slight ones but below are the places I thought might benefit from a quick revision or second look. You are free to disagree *Smile*

to the precious infant boy. (perhaps add a one syllable word?)
all of His followers gave Him (great?) praise.

All said and done, this was such a beautiful tribute to the Lord. I appreciated the message in the words.
120
120
Review of Melody of Madness  
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: E | (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! 🌕 HuntersMoon
You are receiving your review by special request. ~WhoMe???~ has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!


Ken, this really should be submitted for publication. I wonder if you could actually make a compilation of works inspired by your wife (I know you could, I wonder if you will). I am, of course, assuming this piece was written about her. I really think you have a story to share with others who have walked in your shoes or may in the future. You have such a nice body of work, inspired by her...and you have your story...

This poem made my heart hurt. I could feel your words. I believe anyone who has lost a loved one, and perhaps even those who have not, could relate to your words and feel the pain and heartbreak under the beauty of the verses.

I do not have a favorite part. I looked over the poem again, and even though each verse holds a remarkable beauty in itself (great use of metaphor), I think they all work so brilliantly well together that it would be unfair to pick out just one.

Thank you so much for sharing.
121
121
Review of Dark Vows  
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **


Hello! 🌕 HuntersMoon
You are receiving your review by special request. ~WhoMe???~ has requested you be gifted the READ ALL ABOUT IT PACKAGE from "JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM CLOSED 4NOW" . Congratulations!


A free verse poem in which you could only use 35 words. I am impressed that this poem sounds so complete. The topic is about love and wanting, a dark promise.

I find myself tantalized by your poem and find myself wanting the dark, mysterious promises.

None of this poem rhymed (thank goodness). It is my opinion that any rhyme scheme in this poem would have ruined it. The flow was perfect. This was a very sensual poem. I could find no fault with it. I hope you decide someday to submit some of your work for publication.

I enjoyed this read and appreciate your sharing it with us.
122
122
Review of A Flower Seed  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

*Balloon1**Balloon2*Happy WDC Birthday!*Balloon3**Balloon4*


HI Essence of Thought! Happy WDC Birthday!

I came by to read your series of haiku about flowers. I loved them!

All of the haiku could stand on their own if need be but together paint a complete picture of what happens from the time of a farmer planting seed to the final bloom of flowers.

I especially loved the last verse! Thank you for sharing!

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Reviewers welcome

Stop by and review a member celebrating their WDC Anniversary!

Just click the link! *Smile*
123
123
Review of Tender Touch  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

*Balloon1**Balloon2*Happy WDC Birthday!*Balloon3**Balloon4*


I am here to wish you a Happy WDC Birthday and to offer you a humble review on your poem.

You wrote about a mother's love and a baby's crocodile tears. The poem read well. I thought the flow was spot on and the rhyme scheme consistent. I only disagree with your assessment that a baby is crying fake tears. I think they are real until about age 18months *Wink* I do not think a child would cry crocodile tears when suffering diaper rash or teething. I loved how you wrote about the mother's tears clashing with her child's. I have been there, done that.

I think the poem was good, great in fact. I just do not know if you really meant to use fake as the adjective for the child's tears?


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Reviewers welcome

Stop by and review a member celebrating their WDC Anniversary!

Just click the link! *Smile*
124
124
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

*Balloon1**Balloon2*Happy WDC Birthday!*Balloon3**Balloon4*


A very beautiful poem about the beautiful blue ocean. Your use of simile and metaphor in this poem is excellently done. The poem flows nicely, except for in some parts where I think the punctuation disturbs the natural flow.

In verse four, you use very little punctuation. In the other verses there is quite a bit. Perhaps you would want to go back and check the punctuation in your poem. I am not an expert, but some looks a little incorrect.

Frigid and chippy in the dead of winter
Did you mean choppy by any chance?

A war amid the great sea rages
frustration rises with the tension
hell hath no fury like the ocean scorned
as typhoon, hurricane, and tempest, roars
You do a great job describing the finicky nature of the ocean as well as displaying it's fury here.

I enjoyed your poem very much! Write on!


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Reviewers welcome

Stop by and review a member celebrating their WDC Anniversary!

Just click the link! *Smile*
125
125
In affiliation with JUST BECAUSE I WANT TO FORUM T...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **




This poem describes in wonderful detail, 'night time in the suburbs'.

I would almost want to call this more of a prose. Poetry and prose are so similar, that I am guessing my reason I am swaying onto the side of prose is the lack of structure, the lack of any rhyme scheme or syllabic count in your poem. I really do not think it matters. This was wonderful descriptive and made the night come alive.

I am not sure of all the punctuation. I would check it over yourself or ask someone who is an expert in these things. (I am not an expert by any means) I am also not a fan of capitalizing every line. This of course is just personal preference.


How the moon at its zenith full and glowing shows you the way
Bathing your world in a beautiful erie light;
It is so dark and yet so bright out, you can see everything so crystal clear
The sun in comparison seems overwhelming, you think on a world lit this way and smile.
Wow! this is just one verse and it says so much. (eerie is misspelled) You have such a gift for words. I am excited that you choose to join WDC and we all get the chance to gleam your talent.

This piece makes me want to go out at night and try and notice all the things you describe here. We take the night for granted. You took something easily dismissed and made me want to stay and appreciate it to the smallest detail.

Thank You again for sharing a 'piece of you' with us! This is a definite must read! Write on!

503 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 21 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/omniblueeyes/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/5