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348 Public Reviews Given
440 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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26
26
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

The scattered imagery of it was beautiful but it didn't make sense in the traditional sense of the word. But, it did resonate with my third eye, if that makes any sense at all.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

A non-traditional poet would probably find the dissonance in this piece amazing. I would think a specialized audience would appreciate the crafting of this piece.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It spoke to me like someone transcribing their dream state. Sometimes, when I meditate for when I'm falling asleep I enter a twilight and strange and mystical things happen in those times. I don't judge myself or others for the things they experience in this state.


*StarStruck* Glows:

I don't know if many others can but I can really relate to the line memories of things that never happened join with stories people have forgotten to tell. It speaks to my experiences with deja vu. Some people I feel I have known forever when I first meet them and some are like blank slates. Not to mention, I have a few reoccurring dreams of places I have never seen before but feel certain they must exist, only to encounter them in real life later. This poem is the perfect example of why I'm not a humanist.


*Vine1* Grows:

I'd use commas, just to let me know when to pause before going.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I loved it.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
27
27
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I love good a Santa poem and this was one was especially good because it focused on the creation of role modeling random acts of kindness, therefore, being able to spread them. What a great way to promote holiday cheer!


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I recommend this piece to anyone that loves stories about Santa's workshop and home. It's always fun to imagine Santa during the planning process before Christmas.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It was a great creation story of the Kindness Team in the North Pole. What a clever idea! It's not a huge jump to imagine elves creating a plan to solve the increasing numbers on the naughty list.


*StarStruck* Glows:

I love the sense of urgency with the Alpha Team elves and the idea of a records keeping department. Of course, there would be one and it would be transformed to the Kindness Team!



*Vine1* Grows:

I just wonder if any of the reindeer get roped in. Ha! Sorry, couldn't resist.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

The character Sally is humbling because truly anyone can be the impetus of great ideas and it takes a team to listen and spur those ideas into action. It sounds like Santa's workshop is highly collaborative work station and his employees are satisfied.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
28
28
Review of Mule Feathers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

Stories of farm life are great tools to keep us tied to an innocent time. The beginning of the story where the child is cuddled on the grandma's lap is a vivid and relatable image.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

It's a great children's piece any caregiver can share with their child. It has such a great message of silly innocence. I think we can all get caught up in mule feathers if we're not careful.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It was an innocent story depicting and innocent time. I bet Bill sure was surprised! I wonder what the meal was. The table spread sounded delicious!


*StarStruck* Glows:

It was written well and easy to follow. The ending was creative and the dialog definitely kept the pace quick and easy to stay engaged with.


*Vine1* Grows:

None.


*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I pictured a character from a Norman Rockwell painting coming to life to tell this story. It reminds me of a story that would be from early American life when people appreciated their rural roots, a depiction of a simpler time. On a side note, I love how Grandma patiently handled the child's interruption. Charlie is lucky to have her around!


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
29
29
for entry "HUMAN RIGHTS
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

Yes, I consider myself a human rights advocate. I agree with the poem's premise that the U.S. can be hypocritical at times with this multi leveled category of Human rights. I remember when the pictures of the detainees came out and all of the media scrutiny soldiers received.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think this piece speaks to those who look at the Iraq war as a mistake. I think history has judged that scenario and doesn't need any further judgement from me. I also think it's important to write these pieces that make people with different views tolerate others' ideas.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It's a very opinionated political piece that forces thought about an excruitaingly painful stain on our collective psyche. It encourages us to question the decisions our leaders make.


*StarStruck* Glows:

The author stayed true to his point of view and very honestly and vulnerably told his/her perspective. I love bravery and questioning, I think it's the only way we move our moral compass further. The greatest humanitarians were rebels to the governments in their own countries. We would be nowhere without their legacy so I applaud the author for being brave in writing this piece.

*Vine1* Grows:

Given what I just said, I think modern terrorism has intersected the humanitarian argument and one has to wonder if the president wasn't just doing his best with the information he had at the time. In my limited and realist view, Humanitarians will always have work because there will always be war and while I applaud the author for writing his view, I also understand it's a very complicated picture.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
30
30
for entry "HAVES AND HAVE NOTS
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I think you hit the humanitarian nail on its head. It's so hard to fight the good fight precisely because of the divisions of "those who have more, or less." Just from a natural resource point of view, the war on terrorism makes sense. People are alwasy attracted to religion to save them from oppression. Sometimes, oppression comes in the form of ability to survive. When that is threatened, everybody has more and you have less and in that case it's easy to declare war. I think the people who are attracted to extremist of any religions are lacking in resources enough to take care of them.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

To anyone who wanted to think about how class is tied to the struggle of a greater picture of humanity.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

The author made his point of view clear and made his purpose known in the ideas of this piece.


*StarStruck* Glows:

It was well written and generally flowed well.



*Vine1* Grows: Tag:

It flowed rhymthically until the last verse. It didn't have any lines that rhymed like the others did, so it made it a little inconsistent.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I only took issue wine one line, the one about the bread. For me, I think we have a lot of work to still do to overcome geneational poverty and our judgement about the matters doesn't help the situation. They don't need our judgement as much as they need opportunities to better themselves that would be equitable to a life on the streets. It's hard work competing with drug cartels who can offer instant gratification and money. We need to think creatively and come together to solve the problem. I think when I read lines like that it makes me think we're nowhere where we need to be. But, that's just my opinion.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
31
31
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

This piece reminds me of that James Blunt song, "You're Beautiful." The idea that we desperately want a chance encounter with some unknown person is seductive and fun.

Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think everyone wants to feel connected to idea that they could of done things differently, especially if there's a mysterious person of interest involved.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It's a fun and fanciful daydream piece of what might have beens.


*StarStruck* Glows:

I like that its set to narrative and rhetorical conversation. I love the line about your children frolicking under elms. All that daydream for one chance encounter speaks to the idea that she was the one who got away.


*Vine1* Grows:

It's wonderful.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

Sometimes, it's fun to imagine life's alternate destiny. If we had..then...almost like a computer algorithm. I think it's normal to think in those terms sometimes. It's funny though, because the older I get the more I'm disinclined to entertain those thoughts. I guess its because I can't take back some of the choices I made, nor would I want to at this point. Living in regret can be dangerous.



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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
32
32
Review of A Needed Friend  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

It's heart wrenching to read about children who lose one of their parents and their mourning process but when an animal is introduced, it somehow makes us feel better. I love it when animals are written as characters that help soothe our pain.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Pet lovers can appreciate these types of poems. They make us feel better when our lives get turned upside down. And no matter what, with dogs in particular, they unconditionally love their owners if they are treated with compassion and respect.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It's a tale of pet love and their ability to soothe our soul. I loved it and gave me warm fuzzies.


*StarStruck* Glows:

I love the story and visuals. The rhyming scheme is good and flowed easily. I didn't have to reread any lines for clarifications or misunderstandings.



*Vine1* Grows:

I'd like to know which foreign war it was or a time frame. I think you may have had one in mind, but there's been a few and I'd like to be able to place this poem in its appropriate spot in time. It's like another Norman Rockwell painting where I see dim lamp on the street corner next to a cottage or house.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
33
33
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I was engaged from the beginning to the end and the end was my favorite part! I love the fangs of fear brought forth a beast! How sharp they must be!


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Adults and children would both appreciate the ideas of this piece and it would be a great piece of Halloween fun! You could put illustrations this one and make it a children's book. Creatures That Go Bump in the Night or something like that.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It's great tale of a scary creature that doesn't scare the lady relaxing in the chair. She's no fool! It's a good folktale about an unnamed creature with sharp fangs and has trouble scaring its intended victim.


*StarStruck* Glows:

I love the way it stalks the lady sitting in the chair only to find out she's not scared by it. A fiend of fate only to be called a lunatic, how unscary and clever.



*Vine1* Grows:

Does this fiend have a name? Or a more of a descprition? I would love to know more about him and the terror he inspires. He's got to be a legend so I wonder what his history is. That would be an interesting piece of information to work into the poem.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
34
34
Review of Louis  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

The beginning you could tell there was trouble between Sheila and Mrs. Fangoli. And Mrs. Fangoli said some sarcastic and dry statements about Sheila.

The line his nose bled like Mt. Vesuvius was clever.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think I would deepen the plot so that we can really tell why Mrs. Fangoli has a problem with Sheila, enough of a problem to arm herself with a knife anway. I think we need some background there. I get the idea that she didn't like Sheila and found her annoying but that's a far cry from murder.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

I had trouble understanding the purpose. There didn't seem anything major to lead up to the idea that Mrs. Fangoli and Sheila were going to attack each other. I would love for you create some background there. They must share some sordid history.


*StarStruck* Glows:

It was written well. You could tell the characters had a history of being around in the neighborhood together. The characters' dialog fits with the other story elements.



*Vine1* Grows:

Why did Mrs. Fangoli attack Sheila like that? I just feel like we're missing a part of the story but I would love it if you elaborated more on that relationship.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
35
35
Review of To Silence a Love  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I love it when poetry introduces the chapter. It really sets the tone. I love how the chimes also affected Martha.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

This is soo Edgar Allen Poeish. I loved it! I could even see Vincent Price playing the part of James.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

A great insanity thriller. Loved it! Had just the right amount of suspense in the climax and a terrifying ending. Awesome job!


*StarStruck* Glows:

You hit the insanity nail on the head. Martha had to be distraught from all of Lucifer's work.



*Vine1* Grows:

Just an observation, it was a pretty stark transition between James and Martha living peacefully and then the chime incident. It seems to me like there might be events that happended before.

Also, I want to know more about how Martha must have been feeling. The only decription I got was her bewildered eyes. Maybe you could add a sentence or two about her terrifying experience.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

It's interesting that the Chinese built wind chimes 5,000 years ago to ward of evil spirits. I looked up while reading this because I was interested to see if they had a superstitious start.

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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
36
36
Review of Symmetrical Sea  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I felt like I was part of ocean. The tides were starting to carry me. You use such vivid language that catches the spirit. Words like: smothering, hurl, voiceless, uncharted, unbound, etc. The word choice instantly engaged me.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think anyone who doesn't love the sea might after reading this one. It's a beautiful symmetrical metaphor for the way we expand and grow in life.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

I felt my spirit become one with the white-capped crests and black counterpoint swallows. I soared to great heights and plummeted to greater depths only to be tethered to an enlightened sea. The purpose seems clear to me.


*StarStruck* Glows:

The language is beautiful. The action is riveting. I feel this one a deep level and appreciate the artistry of words in this piece. Your sea is also the canvas of life.



*Vine1* Grows:

It was really hard for me to read, and not just because I've been staring at a screen for longer than I should have today. Some of the words were a little hard to make out because of the font style. We have some older eyes on here and I am not ready to admit defeat and get glasses. Although, some today are quite cute.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
37
37
Review of Label Me  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

Sadly, I think we are attached to labels. They allow us to put each other into categories and make it easier to define us. This way we don't have to think to hard or get too creative. We can spend our time on things that really matter like: reality t.v. and Youtube.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Everyone. I love that you address one of society's ills in such an artful and vulnerable way. I would recommend this piece to anyone struggling with a label or maybe feeling the need to question why we label.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

To me the purpose is make us question the relevance of labels. In this piece, the author so urgently requests one just so she can be remembered. What kind of statement does that make to those of us who readily assign labels? If you don't have a label, them I can't prioritize you. It's a sad truth, but in many cases, that's many realities.


*StarStruck* Glows:

Another vulnerable piece that isn't afraid to show it's humanity. It's humbling and inspiring to see this amount of sensitivity in a piece of work.



*Vine1* Grows:

I'm not sure if I like the term flies beyond, but that's just me. Thank you for sharing your work.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
38
38
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I love that you think it's men! What a clever thought! And, your taking lessons from the ladies no less! Good for you a person of the modern age! I love your analogy of the van compared to a bug. Never thought of it quite that way before.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think someone in need of grocery shopping remediation could feel supported by this piece. Or, maybe it might be an attempt to get wives to stop their husbands from shopping. Although, I don't know how realistic of a scenario that is.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

I'm not sure except to say apparently, grocery stores are hazardous to men and women need to instruct their husbands better. But in my house, I leave the bargain shopping to my husband as I enjoy my 5.00 designer cherry plum hybrid fruits and 4.00 cereal with added granola.


*StarStruck* Glows:

This is a funny piece poking fun at the culture of grocery shopping which makes it highly unique. I love unique so this was a good read for me. Your audience might be a little nichey because this really speaks to the nuclear family or dinks (dual income no kids) but still funny for its intended audience.



*Vine1* Grows:

I wonder if you could have shorter, more action oriented bullet points to make the humor really stand out. Just a curious suggestion.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments: Thank you for sharing your brand of humor!


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
39
39
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I believe God exists and nature is his manifestation. I was attracted to the title of your piece right away.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think like minded soul searching people would appreciate this piece very much. And, people who aren't might find it interesting for a difference of perspective.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

Yes, you can feel the writer's religious devotion praising God for his creations of the natural landscape.


*StarStruck* Glows:

I especially love the words artist's sky. It's true, artists gets to wake up and see a different canvas daily. You capture nature in it's most spiritual form giving thanks and praise to the creator. I love your descriptions of the seasonal changes using words like glistening, lush greens, harsh winds and fluffy snow.



*Vine1* Grows:

I am so glad you have so much belief, it's important to sustain faith outside of ourselves in this world. But, I just wonder why God gave us intellect and a burning desire for knowledge along with the ability to learn if we are not supposed to use it? That's a question I can never answer. It seems to me after my own reflections that the only desirable outcome is both knowledge and faith. I think it's important to question, only after seeking can we find our own answers.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

Thank you for your beautiful perspective.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
40
40
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I felt instantly riveted to your experience and am glad that you survived and were able to tell this miraculous story.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I think it's important to share our experiences that lead us into a walk of faith. People are different in their faith journeys: Some find faith right away and don't ever stray, others have a more intermittent walk, going back and forth, and still others never walk at all. This story is for people, I think on their intermittent walk. It affirms the power of miracles and they happen daily.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It's a story on the potency of miracles and God's work in our lives. Things happen all the time that show life is irregular and you choose to discount it as accident or believe it happens by design. This piece has a definite design perspective.


*StarStruck* Glows:

It was easy to follow and I love that you followed up with a summation of events that happened after the accident.



*Vine1* Grows:

I would consider changing but to and in the second sentence.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

A question you don't have to answer but would be interesting is why didn't your husband want you to consider being saved from the accident a miracle? Was it the accident or is it just him?


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
41
41
Review of Just One Chance  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I was a Special Education teacher for years so I think characters like Todd are so important to illustrate how important stories are from the eyes of a disability. I love Sammy's character. What a great ending!


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

It's important that we highlight patience and fortitude in these stories. In Special Education circles there's an emerging counseling and teaching idea called teaching grit. And all it really means is teaching the point of view that attitude is everything and learn to expect failure, and use the failure to better yourself. Stories like these are a great way to illustrate that concept.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

Absolutely, and it's highly relevant and needed. We need more pieces of literature like this and I'm so glad I stumbled across it.


*StarStruck* Glows:

The story is well written with no grammar mistakes that I found. You do a great job at writing the friendship of Sammy and Todd. There really there for each other and that bond paints a beautiful picture.



*Vine1* Grows:


*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

On a personal note, thank you for writing this piece. It's so important that we continue these sorts of efforts in the writing community and I need to remember to remain cognizant of that.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
42
42
Rated: E | (5.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I love the 3 c's idea! Your tips are sound and would totally cut a budget in half or more! Where was this when I got married? Who am I kidding? My mother in law planned most of it but we still could have used this article as an awesome piece of advice!


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Yes, any bride to be needs to see this! So many useful tips like I'm not sure I would have thought of getting a list of nearby parks with scenic picture taking areas. It's a great idea though!


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It's practical and probably would cut down a lot of time on research and expense if engaged couples took this advice to heart.


*StarStruck* Glows:

Some tips I had never thought of: having my dress made, having a wedding in a barn, making your own veil, elevating the reception table with gift boxes, cupcakes, non-traditional wedding cakes, contacting local college for music. All of these are great suggestions!



*Vine1* Grows:

You could totally add on to this by doing a cheap honeymoon guide! Travel expenses are increasing and I bet newly married couples would love some advice there too!



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

Great ideas and suggestions! Thank you for sharing them!


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
43
43
Rated: E | (4.5)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?
Yes, I love a good dragon story! This story has a lot of narrative and description. I can see the Irish hillside and quaint town in my mind's eye. I know I have had to take trips on a limited budget and I think you do a great job of relating that experience to the reader.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Yes, I love the unnatural look in the old man's eye. That was a great piece of foreshadowing and suspense. The ending suspended disbelief just enough to make it relevant and suspenseful.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It was a clever dragon story. I can see the old man jumping and the bride's panic in her voice when he does.


*StarStruck* Glows:

You did a great job describing the scenery and the little quaint town. I also love the unnatural look in the old man's eyes. That was a good bit of suspense and foreshadow.



*Vine1* Grows:

I would maybe front load some dialog in the beginning so we get feel for the bride and groom and their personalities. Maybe they get lost on their way to the town and have to reconcile it in a conversation or something else that gives a peek into them so we can be even more engaged at the beginning of the story.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
44
44
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I feel optimistic when I read this piece. There are soul mates or at least spirits who have walked together many times. It affirms my belief structure. My favorite line is the mystic universe had first created a plan for the saddened heart. That line is the perfect illustration of the idea that the universe has a plan but in this form of existence, it's hard to understand it.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I absolutely would. It's a beautiful reminder of the endless power of true love. Sometimes, life does set people on separate course of events and it can be hard to go with the flow of it but teaches us so much when we do.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

At the end of our life, we have the relationships we built in the world around us and there is great purpose in that.


*StarStruck* Glows:

This piece whispers lovingly to my soul. I love that you started and ended with a songcatcher tune. A sweetheart song in the in the soul of Sister Moon, beautiful line!



*Vine1* Grows:

None



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I wonder what the inspiration is. Star crossed lovers like Romeo or Juliet or more constant that can withstand the disruptions and discord in this life? Either way, it was a beautiful reminder of romance of the spirit.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
45
45
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I feel optimistic when I read this piece. There are soul mates or at least spirits who have walked together many times. It affirms my belief structure. My favorite line is the mystic universe had first created a plan for the saddened heart. That line is the perfect illustration of the idea that the universe has a plan but in this form of existence, it's hard to understand it.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I absolutely would. It's a beautiful reminder of the endless power of true love. Sometimes, life does set people on separate course of events and it can be hard to go with the flow of it but teaches us so much when we do.

Was there a clear purpose to it?

At the end of our life, we have the relationships we built in the world around us and there is great purpose in that.



*StarStruck* Glows:

This piece whispers lovingly to my soul. I love that you started and ended with a songcatcher tune. A sweetheart song in the in the soul of Sister Moon, beautiful line!



*Vine1* Grows:

None



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I wonder what the inspiration is. Star crossed lovers like Romeo or Juliet or more constant that can withstand the disruptions and discord in this life? Either way, it was a beautiful reminder of romance of the spirit.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
46
46
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I chose this one because I am a teacher and already felt engaged. Yes, I feel your pain in this piece. It's hard to teach in today's world when the kids don't understand the value of what we do. But, I will say our field doesn't reward instant gratification. You produce something and instantly either get rejected or praised. Our reward comes at a much slower pace if at all. But, the praise and gratitude come when a student who finds you twenty years later and says how much you helped when there was no one else because for many kids, there isn't. I worked at a school where the trajectory was either Walmart or jail and it gets disheartening. And though I rarely felt the gratitude of it from them directly, it was never between me and them. For me, it's for God, working with the people that needed help and inspiration the most. And, I have a feeling, it's like that for you too. It's like that for most teachers, the ones who are in it for the love of what they do. The great novel waits still but it might have to wait a little longer on my end. We'll see.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Any teacher would love to read it. They would instantly connect to it.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

For me, it's an accurate illustration of daily life in the classroom.


*StarStruck* Glows:

It paints the perfect picture of the modern classroom. Well done!



*Vine1* Grows:

None.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I loved it and felt like I could have been the teacher in this piece.


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
47
47
Review of Wherein God Waits  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

I like the creativity in making God experience human qualities: poor eyesight, annoyance, attending council meetings, emotions like unhappiness.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Yes, I like the idea of a serial killer walking among the God's. So, is this more like a young adult novel or for adults? I think a great genre to explore for this particular piece would be a graphic novel. The audience that loves graphic novels might love a nichey story line like this one.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

A suspense or mystery. Who is at risk for disrupting Pangora? Is the darkhaired newcomer or an old timer like Zeus?


*StarStruck* Glows:

It was easy to follow and no grammar mistakes disrupted the reading. You infuse an appropriate amount of dialog in your character building. It paced the story along well. I enjoyed making God a mortal or at least a character who was subject to fear and uncertainty. He seems to me like a modern day Zeus. Maybe Zeus was his mentor?



*Vine1* Grows:

Maybe you could explain how there came to be a mysterious newcomer. It seems strange to me that unless a new religion was growing on the mainland, there wouldn't be need for one. Or, perhaps to the newcomers arrive first and gain permission to start a religion? I think I need more explanation of an origin story here.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

If you add on to this story, I'd be interested in reading more.


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
48
48
Review of Sole Survivor  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

The main character describes their feelings of isolation and fatigue so well I felt like I could be there with them in that frame of mind. Yes, in that respect I did feel attached. The background into the way the apocalypse happened allowed me to connect further to this character.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

Yes, I would. It's very brief but it packs a punch. The world you describe is so isolated and desolated that it immediately goes into the mind and heart. You really feel for this character. To be the last one standing is an interesting scenario. It's interesting to think humans outlast zombies and then what comes after? I hope current programs explore that theme eventually.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

It perfectly described how isolated and hopeless one might feel in this period of time and futuristic history.


*StarStruck* Glows:

You do a great job at creating this feeling and mood in this piece. It's dark and hopeless. Awesome job with putting us into the mind frame of what one could experience during this time.



*Vine1* Grows:

Is there going to be a plot or story behind this or does the character just have his/her final thoughts and die?



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I hope you add to this one.


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
49
49
Review of One Last Request  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

It's hard not to feel attached to animal poetry. We love our pets dearly and their deaths are a natural part of our living cycle and so hard to reconcile. I was connected at the title.


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

I would. It's an easy read and it's so hopeful. I think this piece would speak to anyone who is in the grieving process for a pet and would allow them to reflect on their transition to peace and comfort.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

Yes, I felt the point and it's extremely comforting to read other animal lovers' pieces. We all want our animals to have safe sanctuary after they pass.


*StarStruck* Glows:

It flows beautifully and is very melodic for a free verse poem. The last verse was my favorite as it made me thing of all the memories of love I hold dear for my own pets. It's hopeful to think that some of the ones who may have suffered for awhile in this life have a better one to look forward to.



*Vine1* Grows:

None.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I have always had dogs and they have always come in pairs at my house. One particular pair had a love/hate relationship and when they died my father threw away all of their things in the midst of his grief. The morning after my beloved dog died (age with me from 10-21), my neighbor called and said the collar of the dog that died six months earlier (my sister's dog) was hanging on her mailbox the day after we had my dog put to sleep. That's a story I still need to write. Thank you for sharing yours!


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~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
50
50
Rated: E | (5.0)
Plot/story elements:

Did I feel attached to the story or poem?

Love a good Halloween witch spell!


Would I recommend this piece of writing to someone else?

It's a cute, fun poem good for kids to get into the Haloween spirit. I love the dialog in this poem. I don't see it used often in poetry and it adds and element of story telling that I really enjoyed! I would actually use this to teach my kids the art of rhyming poetry.


Was there a clear purpose to it?

A fun little kitten/witch story. It's not often kittens get to ride a witch's broom, I bet their adventure was fun while it lasted!


*StarStruck* Glows:

My favorite part was the verse about the kittens riding the broom. It provoked an image in my head that puts me in a Halloween spirit. I can seem them pouncing and up the broom goes! It's a great visual. The poem flowed beautifully and told a great story!



*Vine1* Grows:

I'd love to see more kitten adventures. Where else can they go to get into more of Nell's mischief? Certainly, there's other haunts that are quite a jaunt and more spooky delights of stories to tell.



*Dialog* Miscellaneous Comments:

I love Halloween. It's one of my favorite times of year. Kittens and witches of course go together like apple pie and ice cream.


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

~Tsa~ House of Greyjoy







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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