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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/1019002-Today-I-Wondered
Rated: 18+ · Book · Biographical · #2258138
This is my blog & my hope, writing daily will help me see my progress and log supporters.
#1019002 added October 9, 2021 at 5:47am
Restrictions: None
Today I Wondered
Today, I wondered...how did I do it?

Yes...meth can give some extra energy, but it only lasts until the next dose, and as time went by, those extra doses needed to become more and more frequent. And with every dose, the money would disappear.

Time seemed to pass so quickly when I was high, and I thought I was getting things done, but now I look back and see, I wasn't getting much done at all...the walking dead.

A big part of my decision to stop using was when I started noticing my short term memory was slipping, and not just when I was high. Even on the days I wasn't high, I would go to find or do something, and all it would take was a small distraction, and it would be gone...which is a very scary thing indeed.

My 'friends' only came around when drugs were involved...and since I stopped using meth, so too, these 'friends' have stopped calling and coming around.

So much of that lifestyle now has me wondering...but the good news is in the six to seven weeks since I last used...my memory has noticeably improved...my lungs don't hurt when I breathe and the wheeze has improved a lot. My bank account has stopped hemorrhaging and has now turned around.

Even though I have fewer friends in my personal life, I know I will meet people who are real...who will care about me and aren't just hanging around because of a common addiction.

Today I wondered how I did it for so long, but not once did I wonder why I stopped.



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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/entry_id/1019002-Today-I-Wondered