Toadette's Story: Book 2

Chapter 109 - Clash with Captain Jones

The wheels under the bottle rolled against the wooden floor, carrying tiny Jasmin through the ship. It was no express transportation, but compared to walking, it felt like she was on an airplane.

While pushing her, Penelope couldn’t help but steal glances at Jasmin’s bare feet. Even in their dirtied state, she found them mesmerising. The way Jasmin’s toes curled, the way water dripped from her arches—it was all enchanting. She felt her cheeks further flare and started to imagine herself dragging her face along those tan beauties.

But as they approached a particularly sharp turn, Penelope drove the bottle into a wall. Jasmin yelped, and the bottle dangerously tipped before returning to balance.

“What happened?” she asked, looking back at Penelope.

Penelope groaned, rubbing her forehead. “Just got distracted for a bit.”

“Lemme guess: my feet?”

“What?” Penelope squeaked, shaking her head.

“I might be a weirdo, but I’m not stupid,” Jasmin said, slightly smirking as she flexed her toes. “You told me straight-faced you think they’re cute, so you can’t surprise me there.”

So she doesn’t know I wanna do way more than stare at them, Penelope thought.

Jasmin hopped down. “Let’s switch. You need a break anyways.”

“Thanks.” Before letting Jasmin push the bottle, Penelope tapped her on the shoulder. “You’re not bothered that I think they’re cute, right?”

“It’s really fucking weird.” Jasmin shrugged. “But better you find ‘em cute than hideous.”

“So I can look at them whenever?”

“Eh…” Jasmin’s eye twitched. “Get back to me on that when we’re not tiny and in danger.”

“Right, right. Sorry.” Penelope hopped onto the bottle, desperately wishing she could express to Jasmin how badly she wanted to play with her feet.

This must’ve been how Miss Minh T. felt growing up with Miss Toadette.

***

“Boy… This dirty saltwater has made my toe jam stickier than ever,” Minh exhaled.

Her bare feet, now grey from the grimy floor, made a squelching sound with each step she took. She eventually halted, digging a finger between her big and second toes. Toad and Toadette winced in unison as she slowly pulled out a dark, chunky glob. Toad looked as if he could throw up right then and there.

“Look at that,” Minh said, holding the miniature horror for them to see.

“Alright, that’s gross,” Toadette groaned. “Even for you.”

Minh smirked. “It might be my midday snack.”

Toad shut his eyes. “I don’t wanna see that.”

“Your loss.” Minh brought her finger to her lips and stuck out her tongue. The grime came a hair’s breadth from touching her taste buds. She chuckled. “Nah, I’m not that crazy. Who knows what kind of scurvy I’d catch from these pirate germs.”

Toadette let out a sigh of relief. “I don’t think there’s anything you wouldn’t do.”

“Everyone’s got limits, Toadette.” Minh ran her hand along a mast, leaving a greasy smudge for the next pirate to discover. “Just ‘cause mine ain’t as strict doesn’t mean I’ve got none.”

“Might as well be none,” Toad scoffed. “I mean, we’re still wondering what happened to Penelope and Jasmin, and you had no problems sniffing the hell out of the latter’s sandal.”

Minh pouted. “It’s comforting when she’s not here.”

“Comforting? No offence, but your cousin smells like a buffalo, and I don’t know why.”

“She doesn’t bathe,” Toadette interjected. “Not regularly. I remember her mom getting on her case about it.”

Toad looked at Minh. “Why?”

“Sensitive to water temperatures. Or maybe she doesn’t see the point in it.”

“She’ll be in for a rude awakening when she gets a boyfriend,” Toadette said. “Or a girlfriend named Penelope at this rate.”

“If her girlfriend ends up being named Minh, she’ll be fine,” Toad snickered.

“Excuse me?” Minh’s eyes practically popped from her skull. “Have you lost your mind?”

“You can’t tell me it’s normal how she acts around you,” he retorted, pushing through a series of powder kegs. “I know it’s normal in your culture to greet with kisses on the mouth. But when I see Jasmin kiss you, it’s less like you’re her cousin and more like you’re her twenty-year-old girlfriend. All that tongue swirling.”

“He’s not wrong,” Toadette agreed.

“I… Look, I know she’s odd,” Minh said. “But I don’t think it’s funny at all hinting she has some kind of…incestuous fixation on me.”

“Would you bang her?” Toad asked.

“Enough.”

“Simple question.”

“And I ain’t answering it,” she growled.

“C’mon, Minh, it’s not that serious,” Toadette said. “Penelope will probably make a move on her before Jasmin makes a move on you.”

The trio descended deeper into the ship’s hold. The air felt heavy enough to drown in, thick with the stench of salt, rust and fish. Ahead, looming out of the gloom, was a massive door.

“Well, well, well,” Toad muttered, dusting off his hands. “What could be behind here?”

“If that captain isn’t, I’m tearing this whole ship apart. Plank by plank.”

Toad wedged the tip of his pickaxe into the seam. With a synchronised shout, he and Toadette threw their weight against the door. It gave way, revealing a dimly lit chamber.

On a throne of coral and salvaged gold sat a figure.

He was a colossal blue shark covered in scars. His brown jacket marked him out as the leader of the group, who otherwise dressed in nothing but lowly bandanas. He didn’t move a muscle, but his yellow eyes followed the Toads’ every move.

He raised a single fin. The guards parted, their spears remaining at the ready.

“You got more guts than a Blooper, little mushrooms,” he growled. “Colour me impressed.”

Toadette jabbed a finger at him. “We’re not leaving without the old man and the two kids your ship swallowed up! Hand them over now!”

A low chuckle escaped him. “The old gent? He’s safe and sound, lass. As for the little ones… The sea has a habit of claiming things that fall in.” He gestured, and a lackey presented him with a treasure chest. The captain opened it to reveal a gleaming silver trident. He grasped it. “But nothing’s for free in these waters. You want something from Captain Jonathan Jones, you earn it.”

“Let me handle this,” Toad said, stepping beside Toadette and cracking his knuckles. “Captain to captain.”

“I’m a captain too!” she retorted, not taking her eyes off Jones.

“Aye, and a feisty one,” Jones boomed. “But a captain’s duel should involve some level of formality. One versus one.” He pointed the trident directly at Toadette. “You seem to have the most fire in your heart.”

“Toadette, just fight him already,” Minh snapped from behind.

A smile crept onto Toadette’s face. “Looks like everyone wants me. Sorry, Toady.”

Confused, Toad grabbed Minh’s arm and pulled her back as Toadette took her stance. The guards thumped the butts of their spears against the floor, creating a rhythmic chant that filled the chamber.

Jones gave his trident a twirl.

Toadette burst forward. She launched a flurry of jabs and kicks at his gut. But they were like punches to a brick wall. Jones parried with ease, deflecting her strikes with his trident. For every inch she gained, he reclaimed two with a sweeping arc of his weapon, forcing her to duck.

Her small size enabled her to slip under him. She landed a solid roundhouse kick to his ribs. Jones only grunted, his grin widening. In retaliation, rather than swinging his trident, he slammed its butt into the floor.

The shockwave lifted Toadette off her feet and sent her stumbling backwards.

“You got spirit!” he roared. “Been a long time since anyone landed a solid blow on ol’ Johnny!”

“Then maybe you should stop holding back!” she shot back, panting.

“Now she’s getting cocky,” Minh whispered to Toad.

“Oh, I am holding back,” Jones snarled. “But if you be so eager to face a watery grave, so be it.”

He stamped his foot, and a frigid aura bled from the trident. Two discs of ice materialised, spinning at the weapon’s tips with a high-pitched whine. Toadette’s blood froze. She’d seen this attack before…

“Diamond Saw!”

The discs shot forward. The first one flew past her cap, leaving a small trench in the wall behind her. She twisted, but the second disc caught her on the right shoulder. Before she could recover, the first disc bounced off the wall and rocketed back towards her head. Desperate, she launched herself into the air. The saw spun beneath her and embedded itself in the floor.

Jones snorted. By the time Toadette had landed, he had already reached her. Her punches and dodges were becoming slower, sloppier.

“And to think,” Jones chuckled, effortlessly blocking a fist, “this ain’t even half my strength.”

“Don’t lie to me, you bastard!” Toadette shrieked, delivering a backwards elbow to his gut.

It was a trap. As her arm connected, Jones let the blow land. He then thrust the end of the trident forward with great force.

“Toadette!” Toad and Minh cried out in unison.

A sharp, cold sensation pierced Toadette’s back. She gasped, her powers vanishing in an instant as she fell to the wet floor. She tried to push herself up, but her arms refused to obey. Blood began to pool beneath her.

Jones towered over her, resting the trident on his shoulder. “You fought well for a fungus. But you be a long way from the calibre of Syrup or even that red-hatted plumber.”

Minh tapped Toad on the shoulder aggressively. Toad looked back.

“You wanted to get her out the way first,” he noted.

“Well he’s apparently only using a bit of power. If we needed anybody to be the last leg of this fight, you seemed the better choice to me. And now we know.”

“I’ll make quick work of him.”

“Stuffwell! I need a Fire Flower!”

Toad looked in Toadette’s direction. “What the—?”

Toadette had already opened her suitcase assistant and snatched a flaming flower from within. Before anybody could object, her colours transformed, and a heat replaced the icy feeling in her back.

“We’re done!” she screamed, her voice raspy.

She thrust her hands forward, unleashing a volley of fireballs. Jones didn’t even flinch; he swatted them aside with his trident, letting them dissipate.

“Impressive warmth,” he grunted. “But a bonfire is no match for a mighty glacier.”

Undeterred, Toadette wrapped her fists and feet in flames and charged again. Her strategy had devolved into headstrong aggression. Every flaming kick was met with a block. Each scorching punch was parried.

Panting, she twisted to land a flaming roundhouse kick. The blow to Jones’ shoulder was laughable.

“Toadette, quit wasting all your energy!” Minh screamed.

Toad sighed. What he had in discipline she lacked, for she was letting pure anger drive every movement she made. Without logic, he knew she’d be history.

As she reared back for another desperate lunge, Toad darted forward.

“It’s my turn,” he said, grabbing her shoulder.

“Get out of my—!” She never finished the sentence. He brought his hand down in a precise chop to the back of her neck. Her eyes widened for a moment before rolling back as the Fire Flower’s energy vanished. He caught her limp body before she could hit the floor.

“Didn’t want to do that,” he whispered, punting her over to a shocked Minh. “Stay back. Things might get ugly.”

He turned to face the shark captain. The rhythmic chanting of the guards had ceased. The chamber was now filled with a tense silence.

“Interrupting a captain’s duel?” Jones asked, scratching his chin. “Quite unprofessional, wouldn’t you say?”

“Her warm-up is over,” Toad stated. “Time for the actual captain’s duel to begin.”

He reached inside his backpack and pulled out a peculiar mushroom. Its crackling energy made itself immediately known to Minh. A Volt Shroom.

Jones chuckled. “You do realise this entire floor is wet, don’t you, lad?”

“Yes, I do.” Toad ate the mushroom in two bites.

The transformation was slow. Lighting erupted from his body and shot across his face with an obnoxiously loud crackle. The water at his feet began to steam.

With a shout. Toad vanished. He appeared directly in front of Jones, his fist cocked back. Jones’ eyes widened; he barely managed to raise his trident to block the hit.

As the electrified fist met the cold trident, the chamber exploded in a shower of sparks.

“You’re faster than the lass!” Jones roared, digging his tail in to hold his ground.

Toad unleashed various punches. Now Jones was forced onto the defensive, for the rapid-fire impacts became a challenge for his trident to handle. He created distance with a powerful shove, then waved his trident.

“Diamond Saw!”

“Seriously?” Toad used a bolt of lightning to strike the first disc, shattering it into a cloud of diamond dust. He then crouched, letting the second disc sail over his head. He slapped his hand onto the damp floor. “Let’s light this baby up!”

A web of electricity spiralled across the entire surface of the water. Jones’ lackeys shrieked as the current shot up their bodies. Jones himself let out a sharp grunt of pain as the electricity coursed through him. His muscles visibly seized up.

Toad grinned. He channelled all the electric power into his pickaxe, which he now had fully extended.

“You’re finished!” He swung the pickaxe directly at Jones’ chest. Jones, still stiff from the shock, brought his trident up in a desperate, two-handed block.

Then came an explosion. The light and sound temporarily blinded and deafened the crowd. Minh, gritting her teeth, felt splintering crates brush against her skin as her muscles constricted. Steam filled the entire air, thick and obscuring.

The light slowly faded, with the darker, amber visuals of the room returning to their natural state. This revealed the room to be more destroyed than before, with noticeably more water dripping in from the walls.

Toad stood breathless, his electrical aura now gone. Before him, Jones was hunched over. The trident lay in the water, the tips burnt.

But a slow cackle echoed. Jones pushed himself back up, brushing a piece of debris off his shoulder. A wide, bloody grin spread across his face.

“Is that the best you can do?”

Toad braced himself, his exhausted body screaming in protest.

“Stop!”

Everyone’s heads darted. Leaning heavily on Minh for support, Toadette staggered forward from the corner of the room. She glared directly at Jones.

“You wanna know why we’re here, you ugly fish?” she spat. “It’s because we don’t have a freaking choice! We’re not just trying to save some old man and a couple of kids! Our whole world is in danger!”

Jones paused. “The sea is full of sob stories. What makes yours so special?”

“This isn’t about just us!” Toadette took another shaky step. “It’s about nine Ethereal Stars and a greedy orc named Wario who wants to use them to burn the whole damn kingdom to the ground. Don’t think he likes to share his wealth, either.” She pointed at Jones, growling. “That’s why we’re sailing on your dirty waters!”

The room fell silent once more. Toad and Minh stared at Toadette in surprise. The pirate lackeys murmured amongst themselves. However, Jones remained unnervingly still. His bloodthirsty grin had disappeared, replaced by a scowl.

“Ethereal Stars,” he growled. “So this Wario—he’s collecting them?”

“He’s got two already,” Toad answered. “The greater our lead, the worse his luck gets.”

Jones let out a snort. “Then I wager you’re searching for Syrup.”

“Huh?” Minh shook her head. “We’re not hungry.”

“Captain Syrup,” Jones snarled. “Loots and plunders with no code. She treasures that shiny rock fiercely. It’s what has given her an edge for a long time now…”

He looked from Toadette’s defiant face to Toad’s steady one.

“Alright, mushroom people, you have my attention.” His tone shifted. “I’ll strike you a deal.”

“Why should we trust you?” Toadette asked.

“You need an Ethereal Star, and I need Syrup and her filthy influence gone from my seas. You’re the first real threat to wander into my territory that might be able to stand up to her.” He aimed his trident at the trio. “Help me rid these waters of that witch. In return, I’ll hand over the old man, safe and sound. As a bonus, you can keep the Ethereal Star.”

The trio couldn’t believe what they were hearing. This was indeed a path forward, but one that led through a pact with a monster.

“And if we refuse?” Toad asked, raising a brow.

Jones’ grin widened. “Then I finish what we started, take my chances with Syrup later and feed your old man to King Calamari up there.”

Toadette’s jaw was so tight. She wanted to fight until her last breath rather than accept help from the shark who had nearly killed her. Yet then she looked at Toad, who was winded, and at Minh, whose face was pale with fear. They couldn’t win. Not this way.

“Fine,” she grumbled, pouting. “This is business only, shark boy. The second we get this star and send this Syrup character packing, you give us our friends, and we’re done.”

Jones let out a cackle that shook the ship. The rest of his lackeys followed suit.

“A deal made in desperation. The best kind.” He slammed his fin against his chest. “Allow me then to be the first to welcome you aboard. From this moment until our business is concluded, you are honorary members of the Cerulean Pirates.”

He gestured to his crew. They let out an enthusiastic cheer.

“Now then,” Jones continued, straightening his posture, “you’re in no shape to fight now. My quartermaster will see to it that you get some rest and gear befitting a pirate crew. We sail at the crack of dawn.”

“Hold on,” Toad interrupted. “We’re still missing two important people here.”

“Where is my cousin?” Minh asked Jones. “She and her friend are nowhere around.”

“Hmm… I highly doubt the Blooper would’ve consumed them. He’s only ordered to consume whom we deem fit… If that thing acted out of line, don’t worry, he shall be dealt with.”

“That’s not reassuring,” Toadette sighed.

***

Jasmin’s body strained as she pushed the heavy glass bottle across the wooden planks. Penelope sat atop, expecting her turn to come in the next three minutes. She cringed whenever her muscles throbbed.

“Another door,” she groaned, kicking her legs out. “I thought big levels in video games were the coolest things, Jazz. They suck to complete in real life.”

“You don’t say!” Jasmin wheezed, so dehydrated that her trademark drool had turned to a mere trickle. “I’m gonna die before I make it to that door.”

“Just lean on the bottle; you don’t have to push too hard.”

“It’ll take an eternity if I don’t.” Against all odds, Jasmin forced herself to keep pushing into the next room. Tears streamed down her face as she could feel her legs about to give out.

Then suddenly the world began to shake. A thunderous tremor vibrated through the deck, knocking Penelope off of the bottle. As Jasmin went to grab her, she looked up in horror. A huge shadow lingered over them, blotting out the amber lights. The higher Jasmin peered, the wider her eyes became.

“Penelope…”

Descending from the sky was a pinkish-black surface. It was coming right for them. As it got closer, the girls could make out every horrifying detail: deep lines like valleys, patches of muck like boulders and five humongous mountains at the end.

It was a foot. Not just anyone’s foot.

“Minh-Minh, no!” Jasmin shrieked. Her voice was nothing but a squeak at this size.

The foot paused its descent, hovering mere centimetres above them. The girls were trapped in the darkness beneath it. They gulped. The raw smell of dirt and sweat was overwhelming, with Penelope’s eyes beginning to crinkle. Jasmin fanned herself as she felt the warmth radiate from the sole.

“Move!” Penelope screamed, grabbing Jasmin’s arm and pulling with all her might. They scrambled away just as the foot came down with a final stomp.

“Did you hear that?” Minh asked, helping Toadette stay upright.

“A little more specific, flower girl,” Toad said, looking around the room.

Minh listened intently. She took a step forward, then another. She felt her grimy toes make contact with something. It was the glass bottle. Next to it were two tiny figures.

“Jazz! Penelope!” she cried out in both relief and dread. Toad and Toadette rushed forward, dropping to their knees to get a closer look.

“Are you okay?” Toadette gasped.

“Yep!” Penelope said, puffing out her chest. “We just had to escape a pipe.”

Minh scooped them both into her palm. “How did you get so small?”

Penelope’s face went pale. “Jasmin ‘borrowed’ one of your Mini Mushrooms. I told her to use it so we could escape.”

Minh had to stop herself from screaming. She knew precisely what was in her bag and what wasn’t. There was no Mega Mushroom to reverse the effects of the Mini Mushroom. She looked to Toadette, who shook her head.

“And a new problem arises,” Toad sighed.

Jones, who had been observing the scene, stepped forward.

“Miniaturised, eh? Unacceptable. If you’re to be part of the crew that defeats Syrup, we’ll need every bit of strength we can muster.” He turned to a shark standing by the door. “Scour the cargo holds. Find me a Mega Mushroom. Search the ocean if you must. Just bring me one.”

“Aye, captain!” The guard slammed his fin to his chest.

Penelope’s eyes sparkled. She looked from the giant shark to Toadette. “Hold on. Does this mean we get to be pirates, Miss Toadette?”

Jasmin, however, just trembled in Minh’s hand, burying her face into her cousin’s thumb.

Jones let out a soft chuckle. “The little human has the energy I need.” He gestured towards a corridor. “The mates will show you to your temporary quarters. Get some rest. By dawn, you’ll be proper members of the Cerulean Pirates.”

With a tired nod, the five of them were escorted out of the captain’s room and down a dark hallway.

----------

Author’s Note:
If you’re a fan of size-related content, boy, are you in for a treat next week. As the crew takes a pause before obtaining their new pirate gear, Jasmin is staring at Minh’s giant feet with those creepy, incestuous eyes.