Ramblings Of An Unquiet Mind

The Enchanted Map

2025 felt at times like I was standing in a field, empty of brightness and light. Of hope and nature as it should be. Void of colour, of beauty, of joy.
Instead, there were storm clouds approaching, slowly building throughout the months, and there I stood, waiting for it to unleash. At times I wished it would just hurry and get it over with. Drench me in the hard rain, strike me with lighting to wake me up from my own history of negativity not only towards myself, forever towards myself, but those around me. Lash me until my skin shredded from my skin. But instead it kept me there, not moving forward, but also not moving backward.
Not all storms are meant to destroy and instead when unleashed can encourage growth in oneself and to deal with things that will only improve by the work you put in. I had these moments and I need to continue down that path this year. Welcome the storm in it's fullest and grow even more.

Towards the end of 2025 I took a chance to see what would happen if I decided to try something new, something I have always wanted to try and that was to write. How bad could I be? Well, in honesty, I could be terrible at it, who would know. But you don't know until you try, and so I did. I have a terrible habit of being impatient and of course wish things would move along at the pace I want to set, not coax it and shape it always to my desires, but that which will manifest over time. All I need to do is show up. And so I will continue to show up here and follow this path to see where it will lead. We'll see how I go.

What I am encouraged to work on now is to overcome my obstinate desire to get what I want, when I want it and how I want it. To not lose focus of where I want to head, but to trust if it is meant to be, it will come to fruition at the right time. I can stay stuck in the mud of my many faults or I can wash myself off and change my mindset, my work ethic, and maybe finally believing in myself. To face my challenges in a different way.

2026 here I come. Wish me luck