Ya Know What I Was Thinking?

Break Time!

Woohoo! Three weekdays off! I finally took some vacation! Now it’s time to…

…Uh, now what? I guess I hadn’t planned that far ahead. I’m not even sure what to do now. What does one actually do on vacation? I don’t have the money to travel. I don’t have the energy to go out on the town. For that matter, I don’t have money with which to out on a town to which I haven’t the money to travel!

The fact is, I don’t know what to do with myself when I’m on vacation. I don’t really like crowds, so a lot of vacationy activities are out, like ball games (which is okay, because I don’t like sports) or conventions (which is okay, because I am not interested in dressing up as a stormtrooper, a giant furry rabbit, or Hello Kitty). So I don’t want to go out, which leaves the only other option of staying in— the much-vaunted stay-cation.

You know what a stay-cation really is, though? Extended chore opportunities. Ain’t no maid comin’ to straighten the sheets and clean the toilet at this bread-n-breakfast! No, sir, this establishment is self-serve all the way. But at least you go into it knowing there’s no hidden service fees. You know up-front that you pay for all utilities, board, and labor yourself. There's a bonus, though: no additional charge for porn!

Yep, there’s no staff on hand at your— wait, that’s not true. You are the help you need! See that lint on the floor? It’s okay, management left you the directions to where the vacuum is. That’s a big stack of dirty dishes! Not to worry; turns out nobody is using the dishwasher right now— it’s wide open. Oh, and by the way, the laundry is all yours, even the stuff that’s already there. Feel free to leave yourself a tip.

So I have three days off from a job I love to stay home and do jobs I hate doing even on the weekend. Well, there’s no use complaining. Maybe I should just stop this entry and get off my duff to go see what if there is anything more to do. I think I saw a dustbunny cage match warming up under the living room chair; that’s a sport I could get into. Over in the back room is the often-overlooked Museum of Stuff That No Longer Fits But I’m Too Optimistic To Throw It Away; I guess I could walk around there and take in the culture.

But I don't know if I’m even ambitious enough for that. Maybe I’ll just shut off the computer and watch dryer lint porn. At least there’s no extra charge…even if I am the one who has to clean up afterward.