My thoughts on everything from albacore tuna to zebras
|Let’s see. What to write about today?
I’ve got two of them. They’ve been with me as long as I can remember. They’re rather big and sometimes they don’t smell so nice… at least so I’m told. Quite frankly I never got my nose close enough to them to find out. That’s a gymnastic event well beyond my capability. If my sneakers are any indication then you’d do well to keep your nose and my feet far apart.
They are interesting, my feet. They’re mirror images of each other. Well almost. The left one has a scar on it that the right one doesn’t. They’re pretty big. Size 14 extra wide. Extra wide gives me better stability and stability is a good thing.
I haven’t quite figured out the toe thing. I mean, there are five of them. I gather this is pretty much normal but then there was my great uncle Lawrence. He had seven on one foot and six on the other. He seemed happy with this state of affairs so maybe he was normal and the rest of us are just undertoed. I’ve used them to pick things up off the floor and while they don’t work quite as well as the fingers on my hands they do save my back from bending over. This is also a good thing.
My feet are relatively passive. I can’t remember the last time I got into an argument with them, though sometimes they burn me up. They are not very fond of walking much more than five miles without getting some rest. This used to be 20 miles. I think they’re getting lazy. They do enjoy being propped up, which is the position they’re in now and they like warm socks. They do not; I repeat do not, like to be tickled. This is a big no-no. Once in a while they get violent, but not often. I think the last time was several years ago when I gave number one son a boot in the rear to demonstrate the transfer of energy. I must say he was a quick learner. I think I only had to do it two or three times before he caught on.
They don’t like sports much, unless you can count miniature golf as a sport. They simply hate kicking footballs, etc, but they have been known to dilly-dally with the cheerleaders One in particular taught them a game.
You guessed it… they learned to play footsie.
I’m out of here!