Who am I, Where am I Going, and Where have I been? The story of my life!
|December 29, 2008
Life has been so nuts!!! The semester is over--the new one starts Jan 12 and it promises to be equally as nuts. I'm scheduled for 4 online classes: Biology, Philosophy, Technical Writing, and graphic design (or something like that.) I managed all A's this past semester and was recently notified I won a scholarship I applied for that is a collaboration between Ivy Tech (my college) and the Indiana Pacers. Tomorrow night my husband and I will be going to a Pacers game where I will receive the scholarship...nervous and exciting. Thanks to my neighbor who will be watching my kids since I only get 2 tickets for the game.
The kids are doing well--we had a very nice Christmas especially thanks to some Christmas angels. Many many smiles on Christmas morning.
My kids are home for another week--then I get a week before I start back to classes and I'm hoping to get some writing done with no distractions.
So far, I've just been sleeping in until the kids get up, trying to clean up and straighten up around here and hanging out with the kids. This evening my husband and son are having a guys night and Cassy and I will have a girls night...go spend some gift cards and have dinner together.
I've really been struggling with church--the church we've been going to for several months (because of the move) just doesn't really fit--though the kdis are happy. The churches we had tried before didn't work for any of us...and we desperately (especially me) miss our old church family and friends. Yesterday I went to a celebration of life at our old church--one of our members passed away after having struggled for years with kidney disease, a transplant and rejection, and mulitple other issues--she was 57. She had a love of the Lord and a strong faith--and it made me a little sad that I didn't know her better--I kept her at arm's length, mostly because of her illness--to get close and lose her would have crushed me--being around her and her similarity to my mom (whose been gone almost 7 years) was just too much. And yet it is my loss that I don't share more of a bond with her--since I chose not to be much more than an aquaintence. I did try a couple of times but it was more than I could do.
Being there yesterday, hugging and visiting made me realize how much I miss that part of our family. It's not that I expect the new church to be exactly as the old one...but no one has really tried to get to know us..and yes, we should be involved and trying too...and we havne't much...but it's just the feeling in teh air, if that makes sense to anyone. Cassy loves the youth group and being involved...but I don't even want to go because it makes me lonlier yet...most of my friends were through church, school, or ball...and many times were from 2 or 3 of those. The old church is less than an hour away...it may be time, with gas prices lower, to drive back and forth again...I don't know...it's a struggle...and a conversation my beloved and I must have.
Well, I need to hop in the shower and then do some laundry. I will be back on over the next couple of weeks before school starts back up again....I'm proud of myself--my gpa is like a 3.83 or so...I'm doing well.
Thanks for stopping in...
love and hugs