A story about a guy who grows and learns to see his life and socialization differently.
|Dinner finished without further incident or embarrassment. We had found a way to continue casual conversation once Alex arrived with our food. After finishing and turning down dessert, Bill paid for our dinner and suggested I ride with him in his new Lexus -- he indicated he had purchased it two months ago -- to the movie theater. Now we stood before the box office, looking over the marquee together. "So, what are you in the mood for," my date asked.
My mind immediately began pondering the question and wondering how Bill would judge my choice. If I picked a drama, would he think me too serious or too much of a downer? Would a romantic comedy make me seem too desperate for love? Would a science fiction movie make me look too geeky? I decided to go with the safe choice. "The new Vin Diesel flick seems pretty promising." After all, all guys liked action movies, right? And since we're both gay, we can ogle hunky hero, right? Oh, what if that got him turned on and wanting something I'm not sure I could deliver?
"Yeah, it does. Shall we give it a try then?"
"Sure." Bill step forward and asked the young woman working the box office for two tickets.
I took the ticket he offered me. "I'm sorry. I meant to pay for my own ticket. Or I could've gotten yours too, since you covered dinner."
Bill held up a hand. "Nonsense. I wanted to treat you. It's my pleasure." He placed an arm around my waist and I tensed slightly at the contact, wondering where this date was headed and if I was ready for it. "Shall we?" he asked, gesturing toward the lobby. I smiled and walked beside him as we headed deeper into the cinema.
"Would you like a drink or anything?" he asked.
"No, I'm still stuffed from dinner, thanks." With that, we handed our tickets to the employee collecting them, who then directed us to the theater our movie would be shown in. We found a pair of seats about three quarters of the way back in the stadium seating. Bill motioned me to a seat one in from the end, and he took the seat nearest the aisle. He placed his arm around my neck. And I repositioned myself so that I hoped the gesture would be more comfortable.
We made more small talk until the previews started, which took about ten minutes. Then we settled in to watch the screen. Bill would occasionally rub his hand along my shoulder and collarbone, sending little shivers through my body. I was still conflicted about just how far I wanted things to go with him, especially tonight.
Fortunately, he didn't get any more affectionate or risque during the ninety minute movie, and we both seemed to really get into the action playing out on the screen before us. I only got jarred back to my present circumstances during those moments where he'd move his hand an inch or two back and forth. In many ways, it felt kind of good.....
When the movie ended, Bill drove me back to my car, which we had left around the corner from the restaurant. He placed a hand on mine as we sat in his car, the motor still running. "I had a nice time with you tonight, Curt. I hope you enjoyed yourself as well."
I smiled and lowered my eyes a bit. I suspect that my cheeks were turning more than a little pink. "Yeah, I did. thanks for paying for everything."
"It was my pleasure," he said as he ran his fingertips over the back of my hand. My blush deepened and I was silent for a few minutes.
I looked up and saw him watching my face, as if he was waiting for me to speak. I realized I was holding my breath and let it out slowly. "It's getting late. I should probably let you get going. I think you have a longer drive than I do, after all."
Bill nodded slightly. "It's not too bad, and I think I'm wide awake, so I'm not too concerned." He paused a few seconds, then added, "But yeah, I should probably get going. He withdrew his hand from where it had been resting on mine." I turned and opened the car door. I stood, turned and leaned over so I could see his face. "Have a good night. Hope to talk to you soon."
"Sure thing," he said and smiled. I closed the door and walked around to my own vehicle, unlocking it. Bill waited until I get my car started before driving away. I sat there a couple more minutes, frustrated and worried. Had he expected me to go home with him? Invite him to my place? Would he decide not to call me since I hadn't opted to sleep with him? I wasn't even sure that was what he was after.
I hated dating. I felt like I never knew what was expected of me.