by CJ Reddick
This is my blog for junior year!
Let's Kill Tonight
Panic! at the Disco
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This is the song I listen to to get me psyched up for events. I have a bit of social anxiety, like not officially, I just don't always do well in crowds. So, when I'm about to do something that involves going into a situation where I don't know people (for instance, taking one of my friends to homecoming cause I didn't want to be the senior that didn't go to homecoming), I get super nervous. I used to get sick to my stomach before going to friends' houses, for absolutely no good reason. It was annoying, and embarrassing. So now, whenever I get that feeling in my stomach, I listen to this song.
So, for homecoming, I didn't have this song on my phone yet, so I was just playing it on youtube, over and over again as I got ready for homecoming. I was super nervous cause I had to drive way out west to pick up my friend, talk to her parents, and then go to one of my school friends' houses, which I had been to once two years ago. So, I drive out there (after accidentally heading east for a block or so) and when I get there, not only is she not ready, but her grandparents are there, along with her dad, stepmom, and family.
Let me take a moment to explain that I HATE meeting people's parents. Girls, especially, but guys too. I feel like I'm being judged, especially by the girls' dads, even if there is literally no romantic connection or anything like that. Like, in seventh grade, I was best friends with this sixth grade girl and I'd video chat her pretty often. Once she said her mom was coming and I literally dove out of my chair and hid out of view of the screen. And I KNEW her mom. I'd WORKED WITH her mom. And, it's not like she didn't like me. I knew she liked me. I was just scared to be seen with a girl, for fear that I would be judged or something.
Anyways, so it is literal torture for me to stand there and talk to her dad and grandparents while she gets ready. And then we have to do the pictures (literally the most awkward thing I've ever done-- and the pictures prove it) and then we get in the car and we're trying to get to my friend's house.
I don't know if this is the case where you live, but in our city, some streets have the same name, and it's really confusing for someone like me. So of course, when I'm driving there's a whatever-street-I-was-supposed-to-turn-on on both sides of the street. And, since it wasn't the street my friend on, just a connecting street, I couldn't use the numbers to help. So, I end up on the wrong street, and I turn back, and then when I'm on the right street, I miss my turn, and so I go to work my way back.
You know how some streets have a median with like grass and concrete? Well, I didn't notice that the street I was about to turn onto was one of them (even though I'd been on the street before several times) and I turned left. Then we realized I was going the wrong way, but it was okay cause I got off real quick and there weren't any cars coming, but still it could've been bad.
Well, I eventually find the place, and then we have to take more pictures, and it took forever and I didn't really fit in so I was just talking to my friend Emily the whole time. Then, we went to the restaurant, except I didn't know where that was either, and the friend of mine I was following was speeding like 20 mph over speed limit so of course I had to too to keep up, but that was a short drive. Then, we finally had to go to school for the actual dance, and I was able to find my way there. Then, we were at the dance, which kinda sucked because the dances at my school suck (music is awful) and then I'm like do you wanna get ice cream and she goes sure and then we went to Sonic, except at this point I was sugared out from all the candy and also my stomach hurting cause of social interaction so I just got an unsweet tea. She had some sort of sundae or something. And so we just hung out there and then I took her home. It was a pretty good night.
And, the pictures that were awful? Well, before I left, my mom wanted some pictures of just me, and so my dad took some of me on my iPhone 4S, and they actually turned out really well. I have one of them as my profile picture on Facebook and people have asked me if they're my senior pictures. But they aren't. I still need to do that.
"Ready to Go" Panic! at the Disco