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 |  My second blog. What you get are pieces of me; my humor, my memories: be welcome. |
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MY BOOK! http://www.lulu.com/davidmac73 This picture was in the header of my first blog and I wanted to bring it back. Me and my sweetie on our wedding day....it is my favorite picture. ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** This is my second Blog on WDC. The first Blog, Random Thoughts, is finished and done and I loved almost every minute I spent doing it. This blog will be somewhat different than the first because I want to use this space for my humor and my memories. The humor may sometimes fall flat and the memories may, at times be boring, but isn't that the way it is with life. Please join me here and partake in these pieces of me and if sometimes you find the jokes unfunny or the memories dull, then please come back another day and maybe you will find something to your liking. After all, like my daddy always said: "Some days you get the bear, some days the bear gets you." Thank you, vivacious   for this neat new logo for my blog! Yup, this about says it all, I think!** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** I thought that Independence Day was the appropriate day to put this great new siggy in my blog....Thank you sultry ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Please check out Scarlett's Newsletter for Bloggers: The Blogville News
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Thank you, Startiara  for this lovely Siggy!! ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
| Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. Okay, I think we can all agree on that statement can't we? The reason we got together at all is because the women from Venus are so much better looking than those from Mars. I mean, really, a guy would have to be hard up to chase a Martian woman; that whole two heads-three arms-six legs thing is enough to turn off the most amorous of Martian males, not to mention the scales and fangs. So anyway, since the beginning of time us Martian guys have been sneaking onto Venus to woo the lady of our choice. That, my friends is where the trouble begins. You would think that we Martians would have taken the hint. I mean it don't take a rocket scientist to see the warning sign: THERE ARE NO MEN ON VENUS! Hello! That should tell us all we need to know....these Venetian women are TROUBLE! Not one of us ever stop to consider why this planet full of desirable women has no men. Oh sometimes we think we spot the elusive male of the planet but that always turns out to be just another guy from Mars, disguised to impress the female. No, there are no men on Venus and you know why? ALL THE MEN MOVE TO MARS AS SOON AS THEY REACH PUBERTY. They do this cause they like "guy" things, that's why. Men love to fish and hunt, to chew tobacco and spit, to swear and scratch their butts in public; all the good things Venus women will not allow. So they flee to Mars so they can be MEN. Men of Mars then spend anywhere from twenty to thirty good years on the FUN planet with only occasional visits to Venus to "party". If it weren't for that dang Prime Directive: Get married and raise a family which is genetically programmed into us we could remain happily on Mars. Sooner or later though we all succumb to the urge to mate and settle down and that is where the dang Venus women grab us by the short hairs. We start out by disguising ourselves and trying to pass ourselves off as someone from Venus. This is to lure the female to us. We start watching chick flicks, we take regular baths, we even watch episodes of Oprah. It is always understood that we will quickly forsake these odious habits once we have lured the females into the Make-out chamber of our star ships. "All's fair in love and war" was definitely a saying whose origin lies on Mars and not Venus. The thing is, Women from Venus take us seriously during this "courtship/capture" phase. They actually believe that we are going to change all our bad habits once they have the ring on our finger. Little do they realize that the finger is NOT the place where they need a ring attached to us. So they set about in what amounts to years of guerrilla warfare with every move, every gambit, designed to get us to be more Venus than Mars. Sadly, some men to crumble under this onslaught from the opposite sex. They become a mere shadow of their former Mars glory. But some of us hold out. Personally, I am happy to tell you that I shall never surrender my Martian Manhood. I shall always be the Man of the house, the leader of the pack, the butt scratching, tobacco chewing, king of his castle! Now if you will pardon me, I have to end this because I have dinner in the oven and the wife will be home from work soon. Besides, the new season of Dr. Phil starts tonight and I haven't even started to read my latest edition of Cosmopolitan magazine yet. I have to get in gear if I want to get everything done. Now all that's left to do is to encrypt this blog so that my sweetie can't find it....any of you guys out there know anything about hiding journal entries? |
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