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Mon, Nov 10, 2025

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I think I can...I think I can...

by skeason

Rated: XGC · Book · Emotional · #2015720

Life is rough...I have to write it out.

I start blogs.....I neglect blogs....I abandon blogs.
I start blogs.....I neglect blogs....I abandon blogs.

I started this blog....I loved this blog....I abandoned this blog.
I started this blog....I loved this blog....I abandoned this blog.

I guess it is a good thing I didn't actually hold my breath.

Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

badvoudou

Oct 29, 2020 at 11:47pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

You had me at Lodi Dodi. ❤️❤️

WakeUpAndLive~NOV Word Monger

Oct 29, 2020 at 8:09pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I loved David Byrne and the Talking Heads. Good memories of the Eighties!

Kåre เลียม Enga

Oct 29, 2020 at 7:50pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

"Save the Children"? "Save Our Town"? I believe in integration. Like lower income housing dispersed throughout not segregated. If I were governor.

skeason

Oct 4, 2020 at 11:23pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Being gay is far far down on the list of what makes him vulnerable in my town. However, like I said, we've had this filed under dealt with for almost a year. Hahaha. She's a little late to the party and has brought her own grudge borne out of her own sexual trauma.

Here's what stands out to me in your comment .... You called this bitch my friend. Hahaha. Yuck!

Kåre เลียม Enga

Oct 4, 2020 at 9:13pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Reminds me of being homeless two years in Kansas. Great for stories but too much drama. I am able to keep it at a distance now. I prefer that.

As long as Kid A is a-okay... but I worry about kid K... gay = vulnerable in so many ways and if kid A feels anything is inappropriate then maybe you or him can tell him (don't assume he knows). Your wackadoo wannabe-a-cop friend can do him and others great harm. And kid K should have that pointed out to him.

1 Like

Fivesixer

Oct 2, 2020 at 10:33pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

No judgement!! Welcome back!!

jabberwocky

Jul 18, 2020 at 11:30am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

The experience with the cabinet door seems like it would make a good short story, ripe with symbolism and drama.

Satuawany

Jul 18, 2020 at 1:14am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Your post has made me relive this, so I'm sharing it: So one night, when I was visiting home from college, I woke up in the middle of the night to a full presence and awful pop-pop-pop in my ear. My parents got to be on the receiving end of my full-on panic. I ran into their room screaming that popping bug (apparently actually called a "click beetle") in my ear, and mom way-too-calmly asked how I knew what was in my ear. Because it was thrash-banging in my ear canal while it scurried against my eardrum.

She drew away from me while I bent sideways and pounded on my head opposite the ear it had invaded. She was trying to make me stop, saying something about injuring myself while my dad stoically went off to hellifiknowwhat. Probably just to get away from my screaming about the bug and my mom yelling at me to stop hitting my head like that.

But it was working. It started to slip, and kept popping, as it finally fell out onto their bedroom floor. It popped a few more times, doing its crazy somersaults. Exhausted, I stumbled back to bed to leave her to deal with it. "Wow, it is a popping bug," she said.

Point is, I felt this post, and now I don't want to go to bed.

Charlie ~

Jul 18, 2020 at 12:43am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Soundtrackers is awesome for getting people to think about music and how it rides alongside their writing. I'm glad you recognized your emotional attachment for music and you're able to get the cathartic benefits of it.

Also, sounds like my dude needs to drive his own car. For real though, I get it. Sometimes you look like you've lost it when people are like, "It's just a ______" and it's like yeah, you're not getting it.

Kåre เลียม Enga

Jul 17, 2020 at 1:40am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I couldn't sleep as a child because of mosquitoes. Moths annoy me but don't have the same effect. Bed-bugs however...

Because I'm alert to every sound when I'm home I don't always sleep well. I usually sleep better when I'm traveling.

October 2, 2020 at 7:07pm

#994868

Took out the chips, zigzags, and weird fans...

I need to praise Mt Olympus for a moment. To slay a goat...a virgin...whatever. To leave a pot...my firstborn….whatever. Please someone join me in the delight that is the Cap’n Crunch pancake syrup. Shhhh. Shhh. Speak to me NOT of the deceptive let down that is the pancake mix...put that out of your head. Focus instead on the glory of the syrup.

Few things make me happy. Fuck that….tons and tons of shit makes me happy, even if that might be hard to believe. But so so few things make me….internally delighted. The happiness that need not be shared, nor understood. Blue is one of these things. Blue. Blue. All. The. Things need to be blue. And in my world, 70 - 80% of all the things are indeed blue. My environment, my personal belongings, my wardrobe, my car. Not in a...roll me to the juicer Mr. Wonka way, but more like an….um….you can like all my subtle and all my unsubtle blue or you can not, fuck you either way...sort of way.

French toast is another of these things. (4 of the 7 are food or food adjacent) Waffles are an acceptable substitution but at the same time, they can never be french toast no matter how Belgian they are. Regardless, these things require copious amounts of scalding hot syrup avalanched upon four heart attacks worth of butter.

Cap’n Crunch maple syrup is blue as fuck. An organic shade of neon blue that screams its real maple origins by retaining its fluorescence no matter what the fuck it goes on, goes in, soaks into. It pleases me to no end. I love it. It is blue but tastes like regular maple syrup, cuz ...you know….it comes from regular trees, they are just sad. I will continue to buy it in quantities more than I need, and my need is more than I care to admit until they take it away from me. At which point, the other members of my household will resume receiving regular stupid brown syrup while only I receive the blue gold.

And to round this praisey bullshit out with some of the rest of these syrupy thoughts….
Right this second I am reveling in this syrup. However, I have had to pour it on fucking pancakes. Delicious, yes, of course, pancakes are more than delicious. OF COURSE, they are. But also….of course, they earn the bronze in the syrup race. And who drapes a bronze medalist in gold?! I can see the Cap’n shaking his head now. Dishonorable discharge bitch.

And then to make this an actual post about actual life….
I did a bad thing. I did the bad thing everyone is thinking. I did a bad thing to do said bad thing and then I did that bad thing again. And again. And then some more.

I blogged the version of drunk texting and then decided to...veer in an unexpected direction. HAHAHAHA. Drinks on the house if anyone finds it unexpected.

***Here is where I have spent three days filling in the rest of the post with varied explanations and recountings of why I am here now ...having done a weirdo reset. But I write and write and ramble and ramble and then it can’t end. So I erase and begin yet again only to find that the post has no end no matter what. Which is obvious since...I am only at the beginning of this particular experience.

So fuck it. I did some bad things and THEY WERE FUCKING GREAT. It used to be great. It is still great. And it will be great next time I do it. Because rocks rock and I fucking love them.

Fucking final refusal to keep deleting addition….
I had to unlock my WDC shit cuz it’s been that long. And in the interim (less than 48 hours), I have wondered two things and experienced one. First...why can’t I finish that paragraph up there? It should be easy to fill that shit in with some positively modified AA nonsense. It should be easy if it were true….eeek. And second….According to Fivesixer

I miss every anniversary. My self-actualized junkie is telling me that if I had access to my true love any of these years, at this time of year, then I would have already had to post this very post….. Why is that? It’s not winter and all that bullshit. That’s laughable up in here. It is something though.
As for the experience….I was thrown against the wall in a gas station. Fodder for tomorrow. For now, be proud that I was thrown against the wall in a gas station and am sitting here right now sober. Hahahahaha. Come on now. Sober?! For now, be proud that I was thrown against the wall in a gas station and I am sitting here crack free.

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