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Are You Listening???

by Charlie ~

Rated: GC · Book · Emotional · #2181458

A journey of self-improvement - or not.

Sup? I'm Char.
You may know me from timeless classics such as

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#2030442 by Not Available.

and

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I blog for things like

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FORUM

30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS

(13+)
WDC's Longest Running Blog Competition - Hiatus
#1786069 by FivetricksterTreats

FORUM

JAFBG

(XGC)
Because real life isn't always roses and sunshine...
#2094931 by Elisa, Stik-or-Treat

[Embed For Use By Upgraded+]
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
Buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya
They say jump and ya say "how high?"
Ya braindead, ya got a fuckin' bullet in ya head

Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

👀intu the Darkness

Jul 22, 2023 at 8:05am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Hey Char, It's been a while since I've touched base with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. The last thing people should say is everyone loses their grandparents eventually, or it will get better with time. It's the last thing you want to hear when you're hurting. Death sucks, long-lasting illness sucks! Having to decide to let the person go to keep them from suffering REALLY SUCKS! I think the only ones who can understand truly just how much are those who have had to make that decision. My heart breaks for you.

I'm not religious, but I do have a strong faith in God. I call myself spiritual because I don't agree with all the rules and regulations of religion. I do know I will see my family and friends again, and this is a great comfort. I can only imagine how much more painful the death of loved ones is without this belief. But you're right, it can't be faked. But it is a beautiful thing.

Having mental health issues during times like this makes it even harder to go through. I know what you mean about seeing things that aren't there. I'd walk into a room, and say, "Where's Star?" and she would be sitting right in front of me. When I looked, I swear I saw an empty chair. The mind is crazy. It gives new meaning to a mind of its own

Some time has passed since you wrote this. I don't know when you'll see this but know that you are in my thoughts and prayers, and I'm sending good energy your way. I hope you're doing better. I look forward to hearing from you.

Aiva Raine

Mar 28, 2023 at 9:40pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I'm sorry for your loss. I know they are shitty sounding words that don't even attempt to fill or fix, but they're meant in sincerity.

Having lost several people the best advice I was ever given was when life gets too hard- take it at your own pace. If a day is too much- cope with an hour at a time. If that's too much, take it ten minutes at a time. If that's too much- then you deal with one minute at a time. Work through life and grief at your pace. And don't ever feel guilty because you feel sad. And if you can- find one positive in each chunk of time- even if it's something as little as the beauty of sunlight on a leaf or the softness of your shirt. And ask for help if you need it.

Elle

Mar 7, 2023 at 3:29pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Aw, Charlie, I'm so sorry. It's a shit thing to go through whether it's sudden or not. And just because everyone goes through it, doesn't make it easier. It also doesn't take into account that you were closer to them than your parents. Nobody says 'Oh, everyone loses their parents eventually' do they? Surely not. And that's what's happened here really. I'm actually glad you've got an appointment with a professional tomorrow, because they might be able to help you with getting through that initial devastation.

When my dad lost his mother, he really struggled with his own lack of religion. As you say, there is some comfort in believing they've gone to a better place, been reunited with loved ones, that you'll see them again, and so on. For most of my life, Dad would say 'Religion is a crutch for the weak', but I definitely saw him struggle with the finality of it when he lost his mother, the person he was probably closest to.

My thoughts are with you.

1 Like

~Minja~

Mar 7, 2023 at 3:21pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Crazy stuff, grief. If you want to talk about it, message me always.

1 Like

QPdoll

Mar 7, 2023 at 6:21am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I understand what you mean about wanting to tell your grandmother something. I did the same thing after my grandmother passed. I was at home and the first thing I thought was to call grandma. I picked up the phone and realized that she wouldn't answer. It's so tough losing your grandparents, especially as close as you were. I don't have any magic words, but take care of yourself. It's what they would want.

1 Like

Waltz in the Lonesome October

Mar 6, 2023 at 10:31pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Take care of yourself during this difficult time.

1 Like

Anni Pumpkin

Mar 6, 2023 at 9:06pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I know it doesn't help any, but I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine much worse than losing a parent or parental figure. They represent stability and safety, you grew up with them, and you've relied on them for most, if not all, of your life. You're right, the initial devastation will fade and things won't feel so fresh. But, as you know, grief never really goes away. It just becomes a permanent part of you.

It's horrible that you only got a couple days worth of bereavement! That's not even long enough for the shock to wear off enough to START grieving. I hope you have the support of someone else in your life to help you through this dark time. Take it easy on yourself in the mean time, that's all you really can do. Taking care of your physical self, eating and sleeping, is critical. Sleep deprivation and hunger will make things feel a million times worse than they actually are (which, for the record, is already pretty bad).

1 Like

Cinn

Feb 20, 2023 at 9:34pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I actually pretty much love this one. Nice, man...

Cinn

Feb 19, 2023 at 11:07am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I'd say that more freedom for participants would attract more people. One obvious example that I've never understood is fiction vs poetry. If it's an activity, not a contest, why not allow people to explore whatever the theme of your activity is with whatever type of writing that want to do?

I've actually written for countless contests/activities over the years but never entered... because they inspired me, but I don't fit within the guidelines. Max rating too low, items required (book entries only over here), no poetry accepted, etc.

I know well why people restrict writers' freedom, but they're also restricting the number of participants they'll get. I still just take the inspiration where I can get it.

Elisa, Stik-or-Treat

Feb 19, 2023 at 10:26am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I've had decent participation with Journalistic Intentions (even though I know my prompts are sometimes considered "difficult"). I do think that there's been a bit of a shift in regards to contests and activities, where people have been more open to admitting they find some setups too restricting or that they feel intimidated by contests. I would love to be in discussions to address those issues, but so far I haven't been invited.

July 11, 2019 at 12:06am

#962432

First world tat problems

Artist: The Neighbourhood
Song: Nervous
[Embed For Use By Upgraded+]

Prompt via "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" : Do you have any tattoos or want one in the future? If you had to have a piece of art permanently on your body, what would you want it to say about you?
Prompt via "JAFBG" : First world problems. Tell us about one of yours.

I have a lot of tattoos. Like, a lot to the point of being too lazy to count or list them all.

Sometimes people are like, "oh yeah, I have this cute little tattoo here" and I'm just like, yeah, I have a full sleeve and a bunch of other random ones.

Tattoos are a really weird thing for me though. I got 90% of mine right out of the gate when I was legally allowed to do so. I don't even remember getting a lot of them or what my thought process was at the time. I think it was just, hey, I can do this so I should. Combined with the whole "I'm not gonna be alive for long anyway" thing.

Obviously, I was not thinking that I would ever be a few months away from graduating business school.

My parents always said that piercings were fine because you can take those out. So I had a lot of those at a young age and I still have a lot of them. Haven't gotten around to taking some of them out yet.

But, I have to say, for someone who impulsively got a lot of ink in a relatively short time frame, I didn't do half bad.

All of mine are really well done, tasteful, and colorful. Giant neon rainbow koi fish, I see you!

That's a feat though because a lot of my friends who I hung around with then were getting tattoos that could easily be confused with prison tattoos. Like the cobwebs on the elbow, spiders, five point crowns, etc... Luckily, all of mine are very "pretty" and could never be associated with gangs or prison or anything like that. Unless there's a Rainbow Brite gang, in which case, I'm totally affiliated.

This is such a first world problem, but...

The only thing that's kind of annoying for me about having tattoos now is that I'm, like, not super into them. So, for example, sometimes I'll just be like outside and someone will come up to me and start asking about my tattoos or showing me some tiny butterfly tattoo they have on their shoulder and I'm standing there like, yeah, cool...? I'm not ashamed of my tats, I just have nothing to say about them. There's no magical meaning or well-thought-out process to any of them. They're just cool-looking and that's why I got them.

Sometimes people will be like, "Oh, I got this sunflower on my leg because my grandmother really loved sunflowers so when she passed away... blahblahblah" There's nothing wrong with that at all, but also, I can't relate. My tattoos aren't for other people and they don't symbolize super important things to me. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I feel like sometimes people get kinda put off by me not wanting to discuss them at length or show them every single one I have. It is funny though because I live in a pretty cold area (except for summer) and I wear flannels like 9 out of 12 months of the year. Sometimes when I get back from winter break and I'm in a class with new people until May, they don't see me without long sleeves for, like, 4 months. Then I wear short sleeves one day and someone will be like, "Whoa, you have a lot of tattoos."

I haven't gotten any new tattoos in many years and I kind of doubt I'll get any more. I'm not opposed to the idea and I do still have quite a bit of real estate left, but I'm clearly just not super interested. Tattoos are really common at this point though and that's a good thing for me. It's not socially unacceptable to have tattoos for the most part so I've had no problem thus far with getting jobs or having people take me seriously.

But then again, like I mentioned before, mine are very aesthetically-pleasing so I tend to get a lot of compliments. If I had some of the tattoos my friends have, I think I'd have a little more trouble. Most importantly, I should thank my former self for avoiding my hands, neck, and face.

You've got me nervous to speak
So I just won't say anything at all
I've got an urge to release
And you keep tellin' me to hold on

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