%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Well, not so much fun and leisure as...get some damn writing done, you fool! |
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A while ago, I attended a writers' workshop and the lady who hosted it told us all to go away with this bit of advice - to write for just ten minutes a day. I was determined to go ahead with it and I did...for two days. So today I remembered that I'd resolved to do so and I whipped out my journal and wrote for fifteen minutes. I'm typing out pretty much the same thing that I wrote earlier, with some differences. I find I can go a lot more in-depth when I'm typing than when I'm writing by hand. Writing by hand is such a chore! I've struggled with loneliness a lot throughout my twenty-nine years. I struggled with it when I was the only one home with my mum when I was a teen and everybody else had other places to be. I struggled with it after marriage and when we moved into our own house for the first time. I struggled with it after my son was born and I felt torn between pursuing my writing and being a good mum, because my culture seems to indicate that a woman has absolutely no chance of living her own life - or at least, she has no chance of attaining any goals she hasn't already attained - once she has children. I feel it occasionally still, even though I get so little time to myself nowadays that any alone time is simply awesome. I've tried to come to terms with the idea that being alone isn't a bad thing - and a lot of the time, it isn't. My friends don't live nearby so I don't get to see them often, and even when I do, I feel like there isn't much depth to our conversations. I'm surrounded by people who do not think like me, who do not share any of my interests and hobbies. I feel like I've become desensitised to isolation. Loneliness is my preferred way to be. I walked into my college cafeteria at lunch today and it was the usual hubbub of activity. Youngsters walking around, chatting animatedly, shouting across the room, laughing, eating, socialising. I could recall how that clamour wouldn't have bothered me ten-twelve years ago, when I would have been one of the youngsters talking excitedly with her friends. But, as this moment, I just found an out-of-the-way little table and sat down. I watched the crowds for a while, wondering why it was only at moments like these that the sense of isolation became so strong. In the middle of a crowd, I feel most alone. |
| 06:31 For the past few days, I've been writing "fluff" - non-plot-important scenes that usually feature romance between characters. It's a holdover from my days of fanfiction, when I could fill up entire novel-length stories with nothing but two characters being lovey-dovey. Now, I just think..."Why, Shiki? Why?" So yes, I have developed as a writer! Yay! I slogged through a few pages just because I didn't want to start a new story so close to NaNo but I needed to keep the writing-every-day habit alive so...yeah...I'm sure there are better ways to keep writing, but I figured with this, I could also get a feel for one of the characters - because I did something stupid after writing the mermaid story - I went back and changed the character!  I might have mentioned (most likely I have because I think I do tend to repeat stuff I've written about before, since I have a memory like a sieve sometimes) but I have two characters whose love story I'm planning to write across various 'verses and plots. Their backgrounds have already been set out - I understand these characters really well since I've written three stories about them so far. It's not a series. Each story is going to be standalone, featuring the same characters coming together as a couple, but sticking them in completely different settings. I'm thinking something of the fantasy genre will be the next one. This is for my own amusement - I'm not planning on publishing this. But these characters are too dear for me to stick them out into the real world just yet (if ever), especially through a medium like Wattpad. Don't ask me why - I just don't like the thought of it. So I've kept the girl's name since - due to her being a mermaid and all - she's quite different from the original anyway and there's a whole cultural/religious thing behind her name but the boy, it seems, is a bit more dear so I changed the character  So now I'm left with a character I don't know that well, hence the writing of the dreaded fluff! 06:44 |
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