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 Well, not so much fun and leisure as...get some damn writing done, you fool! |
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A while ago, I attended a writers' workshop and the lady who hosted it told us all to go away with this bit of advice - to write for just ten minutes a day. I was determined to go ahead with it and I did...for two days. So today I remembered that I'd resolved to do so and I whipped out my journal and wrote for fifteen minutes. I'm typing out pretty much the same thing that I wrote earlier, with some differences. I find I can go a lot more in-depth when I'm typing than when I'm writing by hand. Writing by hand is such a chore! I've struggled with loneliness a lot throughout my twenty-nine years. I struggled with it when I was the only one home with my mum when I was a teen and everybody else had other places to be. I struggled with it after marriage and when we moved into our own house for the first time. I struggled with it after my son was born and I felt torn between pursuing my writing and being a good mum, because my culture seems to indicate that a woman has absolutely no chance of living her own life - or at least, she has no chance of attaining any goals she hasn't already attained - once she has children. I feel it occasionally still, even though I get so little time to myself nowadays that any alone time is simply awesome. I've tried to come to terms with the idea that being alone isn't a bad thing - and a lot of the time, it isn't. My friends don't live nearby so I don't get to see them often, and even when I do, I feel like there isn't much depth to our conversations. I'm surrounded by people who do not think like me, who do not share any of my interests and hobbies. I feel like I've become desensitised to isolation. Loneliness is my preferred way to be. I walked into my college cafeteria at lunch today and it was the usual hubbub of activity. Youngsters walking around, chatting animatedly, shouting across the room, laughing, eating, socialising. I could recall how that clamour wouldn't have bothered me ten-twelve years ago, when I would have been one of the youngsters talking excitedly with her friends. But, as this moment, I just found an out-of-the-way little table and sat down. I watched the crowds for a while, wondering why it was only at moments like these that the sense of isolation became so strong. In the middle of a crowd, I feel most alone. |
| 10:15 This entry was delayed a bit. After doing my morning prayers and reading a bit of the Qur'an, I usually get down to some writing business. Updating my blog completely slipped my mind today and I probably won't have the time to do so later, since I'm off to a "peace witness" at noon. And then at 2pm, there's a local poetry group I'm going to try out for the first time today! I'm excited! In the evening, my friend is coming to stay over and we're going together to see our other friend tomorrow, because she had a baby girl last week. The excitement! It's good to get out of the usual routine every once in a while, shake things up and have a good time. I am anticipating that my friend and I will not get to sleep until the wee hours of the morning, probably because we'll be binge-watching some series or other on Netflix XD I titled this entry as I have because assignments have been weighing on me quite a bit these past few days. But one of those assignments features some questions which are exactly the same as the questions I answered for a level three assignment from the year before (I'm currently studying a level 4 year two). So...I copied and pasted. I asked my classmates if they thought it was cheating but one lady said "it's your own stuff so you're not plagiarising or anything". That was all I needed! I've expanded on the answers - obviously, it being a level four, they would require more in-depth answers. But at this point, I'll take anything that'll help! So I'm nearly down one assignment. Ten million to go! I kid, I kid. There are only about four others, and for one of those, I have a pretty good understanding of what I need to do...I think. I hate writing assignments  ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |
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