Silent words. Guilty consequences

Silent words, guilty conscience

With much needed respect, I ask for your permission.
To you, the one who tuned me down but truly meant something.
It’s not that I am mad at you or something.
Truthfully I don’t believe I could ever be.

I just wish to let you know that every time when we about to cross paths,
I’ll turn and walk back to the direction I came.
I will bury my head in the ground like an ostrich until you are out of sight.
I will dig in trash bags and wander in them until your scent is swallowed by the wind and the only thing I could smell is garbage.
On your sight, I will poke my eyes and ears until I can no longer see and my ear drums burst.
All so not to hear your voice nor your whispers through the gossiping wind.
On the sight of your friends my terrible voice will sing loud,
So not to hear your name.

Forgive me for I don’t want to make you feel guilty nor sad.
For I don’t believe that will put joy in me.
Nor do I believe it will make me proud,
But I’ll do all these silly little thing to preserve what’s left of the dam that drips in my heart when I’m in your presence and in public.
But pours when I’m in my bed and alone at night.

Forgive me for I don’t plan to make you the villain to my story,
But I aim to let you know that you are the thin line between my sane and insanity.
You are the joy most find in the bottom of a whisky bottle.

With all that said, I think it only fair and true to say I belong here.
Truthfully I don’t even deserve to step on the blessed ground you stepped before.
For I fear I’ll stain and sully your work.
After it’s all I deserve for cheating on you.
Sphere written