Fountain of Knowledge

Denmark: I don't know much of the mainland, but I've seen many of the islands in the Baltic sea, including Sealand, where Copenhagen is situated. I'm very much tempted to recommend it as a small town. I had only seen it as a child, and after I came back as a grown up from Berlin, it seemed very much like a village.

The Baltic sea doesn't show much tide, and apart from an occasional epidemic of jelly-fish, it's very benign, but not all that warm. The landscape feels hilly if you cycle it, and there's usually a bit of a breeze. Quite a bit. Wind-power is therefore popular, and you can see the wind generators from afar. What you see is mostly fields, no forests.

For a small town, I've chosen Faaborg, in the South of Funen. It's got the best maintained historical town centre in Denmark, and it summarizes what I think of Danish towns. They are cute. Ceilings are low, colors are bright, and it's all in walkable distance. Once, we heard some music, walked through a gate, and ended up in a cobblestoned backyard where a jazz band was playing. The leader credited one of the members: "He's the best drummer in all North Funen!"

Scandinavians are an unpretentious lot; it's their particular charm. In Sweden especially, it does not do to put yourself forward; and solidarity and friendship is something you can take as a given. Showing off is very much frowned upon, and if you meet someone you'll have difficulties to decide whether or not they have money. You just don't show it. If you think of women, think Scarlett Johanson, though she's an especially sensual example. (The men in Sweden, I found err well. Let's just say, I wish they had more of a temperament when they are sober, and a fraction less when they are drunk. Danish men are a bit perkier.)

There's no talking about food in Denmark without talking about polser (slash through the o). Polser are cooked pork sausages, and a very popular fast food. The color should be mentioned; they are red, and artificially so. They look as if jumped from a seventies sci-fi movie. Again, groceries are tear-jerkingly expensive, the same applies to tobacco and alcohol. (Yeah, and it wasn't any use.) Specialties include fish, crabs, liver pie, and pastry.
Now, I'm not sure your assassin wants to attend a typical Danish coffee clatch, but she should consider it. At first you get sweet rolls with salted butter and marmalade, though I'm tempted to call it orange jam. It doesn't have much to do with English marmalade. Then the first cakes appear - dry ones, no fruit, no cream. When you're sufficiently filled, the big cakes fill the table, sweet and fat. Needless to mention, they are very good, too.

Can't think of anything more right now. If you've got any questions, you know where to find me.