Linericks

I'm here making dinner // ’sted of writing Pulitzer winner (Dad )

That I've been a planning all year. (DS )

While soaking my toes in a stream (Dad )

she shattered the air with a scream (Rhyssa )

Exclamation explanation? / Causation, crustacean! (deemac )

Now clawing its way up my inseam!! (DS )

Merv the millipede said "Sorry Miss" (H❀pe )

"But if you'd just give me one kiss (deemac )

"I'll turn into a Prince... (deemac )

"Really! You I'll convince!" (Dad )

"I'd appreciate if me you didn't diss." (Dad )

A fellow who had two left feet (deemac )

offered his three-legged dog a treat (Allan Charles )

On his good right leg he leapt. /. Unfortunately sliced to the left (Dad )

Crashed out the window into the street. (Dad )

a street-sweeper showed up on Wade (Rhyssa )

in time for the summer parade (Rhyssa )

Sadly, while he was sweeping / He was sobbing and weeping (deemac )

I asked why and here's what he said ... (deemac )

"Went to florist to buy Wifey a rose. (Dad )

when an elephant stepped on my toes (Dad )

with toes that are flatter // I'm mad as a hatter, (DS )

Could apply to be cop, I suppose (Roscoe )

But street-sweeper's tale didn't end there... (H❀pe )

As he flop footed up onto a chair (H❀pe )

Like Jen Beals in Flashdance // Water bucket splashed, soaked 'is pants (Dad )

And the elephant winked like Fred Astaire (H❀pe )

an elephant dressed in hot pink (Rhyssa )

Danced pirouettes on a skating rink. (Dad )

She twirled and danced // while the bulls all glanced (Allan Charles )

So she gave them a “bahruuuuuuhhhhaaaaa” and a wink (Allan Charles )

Bulls are unduly stereotyped (H❀pe )

I find they are gentle with never a gripe (Rhyssa )

They huff and they puff // But they despise the rough stuff. (Dad )

Unlike zebras, who are nasty and striped. (deemac )

A short-sighted zoo-keeper named Stan (deemac )

Woke to zebras styled stoker-brahm (H❀pe )

Thought, "Such lovely striped quilts / Each perched on four stilts" (deemac )

No one heard him scream, neath bloody fang(s) (H❀pe )

I think I'll take a road trip (Dad )

What city do you think I should skip? (Dad )

We don't want no emails / So just toss heads or tails (deemac )

Either Chernobyl or Gaza Strip (H❀pe )

So I fueled up the Mercedes Benz (H❀pe )

And paid a quick call to the Men's (deemac )

Cuz my prowess as gadder / is now range of my bladder (Roscoe )

And many's the penny I spends. https://rb.gy/q1avvi (deemac )

At Chernobyl, saw fox with two faces. (Dad )

He never knew which prey that he chases (Dad )

With two noses as tools/ he just falls between ... umm ... stools (Roscoe )

And his prey stops to laugh as he races (Rhyssa )

Said Goldilocks to Mama Bear (deemac )

"Why are you standing on that chair?" (Dad )

If it breaks I'll be blamed // defamed and then shamed (H❀pe )

"You just hand me the bulb, Miss Blonde Hair" (Rhyssa )

Said Bad Wolf to Red Riding Hood (deemac )

"Together we'd make a lovely brood!" (Dad )

Said Red, "'Tis not my thing. //. to have casual fling" (Dad )

"You're not like Granny," Wolf did then conclude. (H❀pe )

A tortoise once said to a hare (deemac )

"Just after that racing affair, (Rhyssa )

"Played a trick, I'm afraid / Spiked your Gatorade" (deemac )

"That's why you dance in your underwear." (Rhyssa )

And alas the elastic was spent, (DS )

Downing bloomers amidst field event (H❀pe )

with his pants round his feet // and a yeet down the street (Rhyssa )

At a phone booth, borrowed pair from Clark Kent. (deemac )

While fishing, Hans hooked a mermaid (H❀pe )

Who spat out his bait and then prayed, (Allan Charles )

Oh Lord, give me strength // then, she lectured, at length (Rhyssa )

On the um, ATU folklore interpretation aid ... https://rb.gy/2rrsd4 (deemac )

Hans sulked "You're a wetfish indeed." (H❀pe )

"Of a mermaid's allure, we're agreed!" (Dad )

'You're worse than a Siren, // now wonder Poseidon..." (H❀pe )

takes care that you don't interbreed (Rhyssa )

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