Hi kylan !

I found this story on the Noticing Newbies page and thought I'd take a look, so here are my thoughts.

The characters are all introduced, but only two cousins (Terry and Cole) are named, and not even the narrator is named. The setting is good, first in the grandmother's house in the present day and then it turns into a flashback. The voice is first person, the exposition is a little heavy but it's probably necessary since it leads into the flashback, and the diction is standard. There were some spelling errors, like "contuine" should've been "continue", "themshelves" should be "themselves" and more. What I observe from this story is that the plot is lacking in substance. I would add some more action to the beginning of the story, and then wrap up the story in the end with a more finalizing conclusion. Although this needs some fine tuning, you have a promising start here.

Thanks for sharing your talent, and keep writing!