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 Review #3980677 |
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| (4.5)| HI dmack! Welcome to WDC! Happy Earth Day!   I love haiku and have been learning to create this rather challenging form.  You have captured the essence of this moment so effectively with this form. The included picture rocks too.With its natural theme and proper syllable and line count the haiku vividly describes the stream in the woods. The drinking stag makes a nice contrast to surprise me in the revery of the woods. Well done.  Haiku generally do not have capital letters and very little punctuation esp. periods so the image may remain boundless in space as one with the whole, for reader to read between lines. The poem was peasant to read as vocabulary was well chosen . I liked the repeated sound in words that assisted the flow and revery of the moment. eg "w" It felt like a river in contrast to the hard sound of "grand stag"-the masculine entering the femine world. wonderfully evocative in sound and image. That he "bows" adds to its magestly.  Impressive model of haiku and I bow to the author!  I learn from you.Light on the path as you write on! eyestar 
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You responded to this review 04/23/2014 @ 10:57am EDT