Review number # 1 of week 3/12-3/18

Hi Rikki,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Vision of My Child

First Impression: I am always sad when I think of a child passing, you did a beautiful job with this passing.

What I liked: The ebony sky trampling, the visual imagery that you opened this poem was very inviting.

What needs your attention: I feel in the 3rd stanza, after breathless with joy... I would add a comma there, to encourage the reader to feel your joy before going forward.

Favorite Parts:The child welcomed in heaven to help with God's purpose.

Overall Impression: Very inspiring read, and well written.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .