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Review #4095721
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by A Guest Visitor
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Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
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It's quite scary what a vivid imagination can do to a person. Here, it seemed it was more like hallucinations possibly brought on by a half-heard news report but whatever the reason, the main character's reaction was very extreme. At first, the readers were with him as he tried to drown out the increasing noise by turning up the TV. Even cutting down the trees made sense to a point, although the neighbour didn't seem to see it that way. But then the story took a rather disturbing turn and it became clear that the threat the main character perceived wasn't really there.

The ending was quite gruesome but you kept it short and the details weren't too vivid. At that point, it was expected that the main character wouldn't come out of it unscathed so the readers weren't surprised, although you kept a bit of a twist for the last sentence.

If you wanted to edit this story, I would suggest two areas to concentrate on. There were a few spelling errors which you could easily find it you used spell check. You might also want to find a few synonyms for some of the words you repeat a few times, like "awful." If you could think about something more descriptive there, it might help the readers to imagine the sound better and the distress that it causes the main character. This would also help to make his extreme actions more believable.

I think you have a good basis for a horror story here and as I am not a fan of bugs, I found the thought of something like this happening sufficiently scary to make shivers run down my spine as I was reading. If you polished this piece to fix the errors and make it a little more descriptive, this tale would be a smoother read and could be even more frightening.

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