Hi Marlon! Mia here. I’m responding from you sending in a review request. I come in peace
I loved how you wove the love between the two so eloquently. It really spoke volumes and I could easily visualize what was happening, which was a definite plus for me.
I would say just punctuation. There are a few places where you need a semicolon instead of a comma, so it breaks up the poem and makes it smoother. An example of that would be the second stanza:
Walking along the boardwalk,
Your warmth caressed my being,
After being, you need a period.
I really liked this. Usually I wouldn’t review romance, but this was good. I hope this review was helpful and as always, keep writing. I can’t wait to read more