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Hallo! This one showed up on 'Read and Review' and I'm wondering if it's a finished piece or a work in progress. Your first sentence is a good hook and it goes on to be intriguing, so I'd like to know what happens. The emotion comes straight from the heart. Maybe you could dwell on it a bit more before you push the plot forward. Suggestions based on what I've read so far: 1. Pick a couple more 'genres' 2. WritingML - font, size, line-spacing. 3. You give something away in the brief description, is that intended? Write On! - Sonali
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