Hello, Huntersmoon!


INITIAL IMPRESSION / OVERVIEW:

I enjoyed reading your "It Doesn't Seem Like Christmas" poem every time I read it, including today.

Your writing kept me riveted and I read straight through to the end.



MORE DETAILED FEEDBACK:

Happy Writing.Com Anniversary month! I read this "It Doesn't Seem Like Christmas" poem of yours sometime in the past and enjoyed it, but didn't have time to review it right then, so I flagged it for an anniversary review (meaning I saved the link to it in a special "December" file. ). I hope you enjoy this review as a celebration of your time here and find the review uplifting and encouraging.

I imagine most parents of adult children could totally relate to this "It Doesn't Seem Like Christmas" poem of yours. I don't have my own human children, but I can imagine most parents feel this way. I hope they also give into the impulse to call their kids and share the magic of their memories with them. I imagine this would brighten and enrich the lives of all involved.

I liked the rhyming in your poem and that you made it seem natural (instead of forced).

My favorite parts were the specific memories you shared. It brought your family holidays to life in my imagination as I read your poem.

I thought you did a great job with the "writing and magic" prompt for the "Senior Center Forum" contest you entered this poem in originally.

I didn't notice any spelling or grammatical mistakes (or mistakes of any kind) in your "It Doesn't Seem Like Christmas" poem.

I thought the family genre you selected was appropriate for this"It Doesn't Seem Like Christmas" poem of yours. If you wanted to add another, I'd recommend "holiday." Especially at this time of year, I imagine there are people that search for that genre.



IDEAS TO MAKE YOUR PIECE STRONGER:

In the spirit of helpfulness, I have one little suggestion to make your piece stronger. If you're interested in some constructive criticism, read on. But if you aren't, no worries. Just know that I enjoyed your piece and move on to the next section.

The line "assembling a toy" felt so much shorter than the rest, even though there was at least one line with only one more syllable, this one stood out to me. If you wanted to make it longer and keep the meaning and rhyme you could change it to something like "assembling a gift or toy" ... though I'm sure you could come up with something better than my example. Just a thought. My first thought was "assembling various toys," but that would ruin the rhyming.

As with any review, please take what serves you and release or ignore what doesn't.


CONCLUSION:
I enjoyed reading your "It Doesn't Seem Like Christmas" poem, and empathized with your sentiments that you expressed in it.

Thank you for sharing your time, creativity, heart, experiences, and writing with the Writing.Com community!

Once again, happy anniversary month! I hope the year ahead is filled with blessings and joy for you and your whole family!

May love, joy and peace be yours in abundance!
PWheeler










Positive Hearts
A Review from: "Positive Hearts Reviews Group" 




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .