%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 Review #4815800 |
 | My time with the undead  [13+] Working on a ventilator unit as a new Nurse  |
| (4.5)  HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"   First Impressions: Apparently today is International Nurses Day, so this seemed like an appropriate story to read and review for the occasion. You didn’t hold back, and the details of your patients’ struggles was quite harrowing. As a 21-year-old being thrown into that kind of situation without much experience must have been very difficult. You described what was happening to the patients and what you had to do very well, a little too well in places because it made me (not a medical professional) quite uncomfortable. You, of course, didn’t have the luxury of glossing over parts you didn’t want to see; you were stuck in the middle of it and had to do the best you could to help them. I’m not surprised that you still dream about those days when life gets stressful.  Suggestions: Most received their breath through tracheostomy tubes, and those few who were alert were unable to speak aloud: I learned to read lips. I don’t think the colon is right there. It implies an explanation, but the second clause doesn’t explain the first. I would replace it with a period. He had been shot in gang related violence “gang-related” should be hyphenated. some post-MI's (heart attacks) “MIs” is plural and shouldn’t have an apostrophe. Shortly before she died her blood sugar readings went haywire I believe there should be a comma after “died” to set off the introductory phrase.  Final Thoughts: While the story wasn’t easy or comfortable to read, I think that was the point - and it was very effective. I did appreciate the emotional honesty and your raw, unfiltered reflections which conveyed the emotional toll of working in such a place. It’s something that the general public often forget, and a little reminder never goes amiss. You handled themes of suffering, dignity, ethical boundaries, death, and trauma with maturity, and the fact that you were young and inexperienced at the time made the narrative very powerful. In a world that often hides its suffering behind closed doors and sanitized language, this story forces us to look. And in looking, we honour the patients, the caregivers, and the quiet courage it takes to show up every day for the broken and the barely living.
|
|||
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "
You have not yet responded to this review.