This came up on 'Read & Review.'

The story at its core is a strong one. The busker playing, having an emotional connection with an audience of one, then that audience disappearing and the busker moving on to the next town. Great stuff, and really worth exploring.

But the delivery needs tightening.

Technically, there were a few places where full stops were used instead of commas, and you had a habit of repeating names and longer words where the repetition was not needed. The jump to present tense describing the park also felt jarring; while I understand the park is still there and this is still its "thing," it jars. Otherwise it was okay.

Story-wise:
- why describe his clothing? it does not speak of his character and does not play into the story at all.
- back-story is great, but it went on too long for a short story.
- why use "now the sun was setting"? It is a jump that places it in the present, which the verb tenses do not.
- there was a lot of tell and not much show. We know nothing about Tommy's innermost thoughts and feelings. Things happen, he moves on. In a story, a character or the reader should change in some way. Tommy just moved on to the next town.

This sounds negative, and I apologise, but the thing is, at its core, the idea of this story is really strong. With some work, it could be a powerful piece.

Good luck going forward.

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .