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Review #4835048
Viewing a review of:
 Poems August Running Open in new Window. [13+]
My collection of nature poems with people. Imagist and modern. (poems from 2009-2012).
by Philwon Author Icon
         Review for entry/chapter: "Iar Verzi" Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
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Greetings!

This is a crystalline poem, sharing thoughts and images in crisp, carefully chosen words. I see efficiency of vocabulary, with no extra words such as "the." Lines are balanced in length, spare and spartan. The scene and situation unfolds itself upon several readings... We see what appears to be a chance meetup with a past lover, and a glimpse of inner turmoil brought about by the unexpected interaction. Determination to be both cool and also to "test his feelings" is seen, showing a conflict of attitudes. A glimpse of a student in the background, absorbed in a book... Or is that an image of the narrator wishing they were such a calm and removed figure in the moment?

The simplicity and triteness of such a brief encounter is given a sense of mysteriousness by the word choices and the open-ended feeling of uncertainty. Were words exchanged, the meeting acknowledged? Or did the two souls slip past each other, perhaps without realizing the significance of the event? We are left to fill in the blanks with our own imagination, which is perhaps the best part of poetry.

I always recommend using something larger than the default font, especially when the vocabulary is brief and the lines are short. It makes one's poetry so much more impactful on the page. I would also suggest you add an elegant cover art to the book this is stored in. It will draw the eye to it and look more professional. Also, perhaps you might want to see how it looks if the text is centered on the page; I should look into the various rules and concepts behind the alignment of poetry, it might be helpful for me as well.

Take care, thanks for sharing and keep writing *WingL**HeartO**WingR*
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