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Review #4842711
Viewing a review of:
Foster's Alley Open in new Window. [13+]
A woman encounters a memory from her past.
by Jezri Author Icon
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#4842711
Review of Foster's Alley  Open in new Window.
Review by Tiggy 🌺 Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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*StarO* A review from "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.*StarO*




*PenB* First Impressions:

That story took an unexpected turn. I was hoping for a happy ending. Dena’s backstory was horrible, but you told it with a sympathetic voice so the readers were able to understand some of her choices. Her situation had been difficult - she had no money and an abusive boyfriend; the decision to give up the baby hadn’t been hers. What happened afterwards was, of course, not excusable, but there was part of me that hoped she would perhaps be able to save a baby on this night.

That wasn’t what happened. What started as a family drama turned into horror quite quickly when she discovered that she had been right to be scared of the dark alleyway. It didn’t hold any form of redemption for her, and her crime all those years ago turned out worse than she thought it was when it turned out that her baby had still been alive when she dumped him. I could imagine the scene with the children well - better than I wanted to, actually - and the repetition of “Die, die, die…” was quite chilling.


*PenG* Suggestions:

The story was very polished and I only noticed a couple of small errors:

you’ve got another think coming
Just a typo, “another thing”.

Gore and maggots’ oozed
There shouldn’t be an apostrophe at the end of “maggots”.


*PenP* Final Thoughts:

The story delivered a grim but powerful message about guilt and consequences, and the ghosts that never quite stay buried. The supernatural element felt like an extension of Dena’s own torment rather than a random twist, which made the horror hit harder. I thought the way you blended the memory and the present danger was particularly well done to keep the tension up. Personally, I would have liked a hint of emotional resolution at the end, even just one line of recognition, regret, or peace - it might give the ending more depth beyond pure punishment. It wasn’t an easy story to read, emotionally speaking, but it was certainly an effective one.




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