Curse you.

Remember me?

Why so different all of a sudden?
If i could count all your lies,
It’d always be more than a dozen.
When i talk, bad is done,
Any sound i make is forbidden,
For your mind heats up faster than an oven.
All this hatred and anger you bestowed,
Is this what you wanted to summon?

Don’t be upset,
For this is not a gloom-filled poem,
Nor is it a lie, trap or threat,
And it is all on you, if you read and feel regret,
For this is all which you will get,
But even with regret, you’d still forget,
And leave me burnt-out like a used cigarette.
All you do is control and order me around like a pet,
And if i were to disappear, you’d act all pure, i bet.
As if you’ve never left me drowning in debt,
A debt of love, which you yourself will never get.

I start with a line that might shock you,
Prepare yourself…
I feel anger and rage inside of me too.
I know i may never show it,
But this is a feeling i always knew,
Sort of gathered up inside me,
Like leafs of autumn which never blew.
First time i yelled,
It was so strange, so new.
Second time i yelled,
My face grew red, despite being stained with blue.
Third time i yelled,
I realized all the lies i said had become true.
When i looked at myself in the mirror,
I realized how much i grew,
How much i had spoilt,
Where is my innocence?
I never even realized it withdrew.

Why is my heart trembling like it has never before,
Where is all my patience?
Where is all the joy that i longed for?
And my heart asks me,
“When will be the end of this war?”,
I do not know, dear soldiers…
We are only left to explore.
Explore the battlefield, and let our eyes pour,
We pour so much it becomes a sea of tears,
I graze my fingers over the shore,
But the sea swallows me whole.
My soldiers do not help,
But continue to pour and ignore,
Despite their leader not being there anymore,
And without a leader, how can a man find his core?

This poem might give you a sense of bliss,
That someone else feels this way too,
Then you’d finish, and dismiss,
Moving on with your life,
Never even paying attention to how this poem tore an abyss.
And you will never know how i truly felt writing this,
Just a small grasp, Just the gist.
And for a while, you’ll sit there and argue, glare and hiss.
I hope this poem haunts you in your dreams,
And each day this will be the poem which you will cry for, and miss,
Alas, I am about to finish…
“Will you forget me?”, Is how i end this.