Synapse To Grenada

What we love about hand grenades

It was a day like any other. The sun was fixated on the sky determined to make it blue and to fill the land, any land worth standing on, with light, by supplying it with ample illumination just as bright. A band of students from Westland College, dressed in white, left their home land behind with a mission to kill the pope. No one in the group knew which direction Rome was going to be so the pope was safe from harm for the foreseeable future or at least for the time being.

The students had told their friends and families they were off to murder the holy man of God or something worse but refused to give details at the time as it must be kept a secret for everyone involved so as not to spoil the plot. The truth is, the warriors dressed in white never had any plan to kill the pontiff. They were going to tickle him into submission for the sake of all mankind.

In 1492 in the town of Synapse, (minutes away from everywhere) exploration was cumbersome as maps were completely inaccurate, difficult to find, and even more difficult to read, especially for college students who only had sex and drinking on their minds.

In really this is a story about hand grenades.

The warrior students never made it to Rome. (God preserve us.) They made it half way there. “Half way there” meaning, they made it half way in the opposite direction from where they had started, as Rome was only a few stone throws away in the opposite direction from where they started.

It all worked out for the best. Society ended up with an un-tickled pope or worse. The students decided to stop at a beautiful virgin green land between two large snow topped hills. The twin peaks looked exactly like mammary glands jutting up from the ground in all their pristine glory. (Praise be to God.)
They decided to settle in the valley of the twin peaks and established what we know today as Grenada. (A derivative of hand grenade.) There were many tracks of time elapsed and caveats involved before the name was finally settled on.

It is now 2026 as the crow flies or time flies. For years the people from Grenada only experienced tranquility, peace and love. No one ever visited their land of cleavage though everyone would be welcomed. One day, we know not when or which one, a troop of men dressed in green uniforms drove into their community in black jeeps. The villagers figured they belonged to a cult because everyone of them was dressed up in the same dark ugly green. The leader of the jeep people came up to the mayor of the village. (the village idiot) and asked him for directions to Rome. Obviously, like his ancestors before him from back in 1492, this individual knew not of what he spoke and certainly knew not of said location being expounded upon on this or any other planet in the solar system by the questioner in question. He simply pointed up as village idiots might do.

The jeep leader took offense to this and handed the man a grenade with the pin still in it.
The mayor was overcome with gratitude and began to cry for the gift so graciously given to him by a total stranger. This all came to a halting end when the general slapped the man in the face and then drove off with all his merry green men, never to be seen again.

The people realized they had never named their village. They decided on Granada on the spot. Word went out far and wide about the iron object. People would visit from great distances just to get a glimpse.
No one in the village knew anything about the mysterious gift bestowed upon them. For weeks everyone in the community speculated on what it could be and what it could mean to their prosperity. A small child yelled out. “Pull out the pin!” “There might be candy inside!” Everyone screamed with high hopes and joy, jumping up and down because sideways was not allowed. “Yes!” “Yes!” “Pull the pin!” “Pull the pin!”

Everyone gathered around the object. Someone made the observation that it was designed something like a pineapple. Maybe there was delicious fruit inside. Another person shouted, “What if it’s an alien life form? Everyone pointed to the door and asked that person to leave the room as everyone knows that Mexico is thousands of miles away and no where near Europe in those days.

Dignitaries from Synapse and all around the globe came to pay homage to the mysterious object.
The mayor decided to pull the pin on Christmas and pray to Saint Muffin for protection.
We’re very sure everything will be just fine. You can’t go wrong with a muffin by your side.