How?

And the pieces start to fall into place and the conversations make sense….

While we spoke about staying friends,
You kept asking how?
How did I stay friends with all my exes?
Even the one who cheated on me?

How?
How did I forgive that?
Are we really friends?

And now I understand…
You were cheating.

She cheated, but she didn’t really.
I was away for a weekend,
She met someone,
She didn’t expect to,
And it switched for her.

She told me as soon as I got back.
Face to face.
She let me ask questions.
She let me work through the anger and disappointment with her.

And yes, we had a period when we didn’t speak but she found her person,
And it wasn’t me.

That’s not this.
We were together for six years,
And you started something with someone else.
You were messaging me, calling me,
You were spending time with me.

We spoke words of love,
We made plans, we went away,
And all the while you were flirting,
And building something with someone else.

You didn’t tell me,
You didn’t even try.

You dropped me a WhatsApp.

And you didn’t even give me a chance to talk about it,
To understand what happened,
To work through the grief,
The loss,
To process any of it.

You took a minutes worth of anger, heartbreak, disbelief and utter despair,
As all of who I am, all of who I was.
And that was enough to block me.
An emotional outburst,
A breakdown at my lowest point,
And that’s what you took to be me.

You cut me out of your life completely.

How do I remember anything between us without thinking it was all lies?
The messages, the photos, the words spoken between us,
What was true?
When did the lies start?

How do I recover from becoming nothing
To the person who forever holds my world?


10-12-2025