Having had brief spells of depression years ago, I understand the feelings behind this poem. Like all good writing, it did pull me in and bring back memories of those days, if only for a few minutes.
I will be reading more of your work and hope some are more uplifting as I refuse to be unhappy today. Well done!
I didn't see that ending for her child coming. Very well written, in my opinion, with excellent descriptions of the characters. I'm new here, so hopefully this is how a critique should be written and posted.
Only one small quibble, and I might be wrong. Are you sure your use of the semicolon throughout is correct when you separate a dependent and independent clause? For example:
She looked back to the Figerro; her wild, quivering eyes pleading for help.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.20 seconds at 9:38am on Jun 16, 2024 via server web1.