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blog of a person who seems to be invisible...
ok.. so I'm taking a next step in my life. I'm improving on myself. I'm going down this path i am on, thanks to God. I now attend a church regularly, and I like its small confines in a church building i attended nearly 40 years ago. To me it is surreal.

Do i know whats ahead, or even where I am going? no, not at all. to be honest it scares me, but I need to step out of my fear and take charge of my life, and live it the way I and God want me to be. where ever this path goes, I'm sticking it out to the end. I feel it is a testament to who I am.
I am learning more and more everyday about myself. and improving, also trying to make amends for past mistakes.
But one can only make amends for mistakes where there was mistakes to begin with, if people don't want to listen then that is their fault, and their loss. I wont go where im not wanted and I know I am a good man, if you don't.. well that's too bad so sad for you...
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July 21, 2016 at 7:48am
July 21, 2016 at 7:48am
Day 1335: July 21, 2016

I got shiny new crutches yesterday that I have to use for 7 weeks, and I have a big batting, plaster, Ace wrap, and tape covered lower left leg. Interesting story, really, but I will leave that for my blog. But I want to hear of a time YOU were on crutches or were in a cast/splint. How did you injure yourself? Were you a kid or an adult? Can you laugh about it now that it's in the past (unless it is something you're still going through, in which case how are you coping?) If you've never been injured this way, what do you attribute that to?

I have been on crutches before, and actually have to keep a set with me at home as I suffer from something my grandfather"gave" top me through genetics.... Its called gout. I am on medication and it has been a number of years since I have had an attack of it.

You think you know pain? You think you know about being uncomfortable? Try having your joints swell to the size of a grapefruit, with no relief available.... the joints fill up with fluid and swell, eventually they become immobilized in movement as well as immobilized with pain as well and yes the pain is extreme... never felt anything like that at all.... ever.

I was an adult when I had my first attack of gout, in my knee. It swelled up so much the doctor had top cut the dress pants off of me because it swelled up so much the fabric on the pants was frozen around the swelling. trust me that's pain.

a new sig for me.
July 8, 2016 at 8:30am
July 8, 2016 at 8:30am

Day 1332 July 8, 2016

I was reading Creating Characters by the editors at Writer's Digest and came across this:
There is a character hierarchy where not all characters are created equal. They indicate place holders,walk-ons, minor characters and your lead characters create the story. I'm curious how do you measure the importance of each character before the story develops or does it just fall into place? I'm a poet trying to learn more.

Im of the beliefe that they kind of fall into place beased on the story that your main character wishes to tell, especially since the main character is the one the story should be designed around, regardless of the genre. As far as measuring the importance of each character, that is so hard to do, especially since the one minor character that is doing nothing now, could, in the future, play a much bigger role in the story.

Personally I just feel my way carefully, not discounting anything or any body along the way... Its hard to explain how I do it.... other than to say that I just do.

a new sig for me.
July 5, 2016 at 11:48am
July 5, 2016 at 11:48am
DAY 1327 July 5, 2016
How do you feel about firework displays? Professional or Amateur? How do you feel about the latest trends with music? Are they popular in other parts of the world or is it just an US tradition? If so tell us about them.

I enjoy a good fireworks display, if done right. I also know, having worked for the disney theme parks here in Florida, how dangerous they can be. Most of my problem is with people nowadays, they think they can do anything the pros do and better than they do. But all too often they find them selves in the hospital, or worse. and then the family fights with the company that made them saying it was there fault th\at their loved one is in the hospital or dead... But what they fail to realize that the loved one is there because he/she is a complete idiot, and a moron, who should not have been anywhere near anything explosive.... ever!

I like the timing to music, I feel it brings the show to a new level.... and trust me Disney is the king of it.

a new sig for me.
June 29, 2016 at 6:12pm
June 29, 2016 at 6:12pm
Day 1323: June 29, 2016

Prompt: June 29 is International Mud Day. This is the day to get down, get dirty and have fun in the mud. Almost everyone has mud memories about playing in the mud. Write a story or poem about mud in celebration of International Mud Day.

I have never heard of mud day. This is a new concept for me to be dealing with, I guess its another one of those holidays somebody made up to fill a day, or maybe a reason to celebrate. Nonetheless, I do have a mud memory to share.

It started with my freshman year in High school, actually it began with the summer before. Everybody in the Tarpon Springs High School band was required to attend the summer band camp, as well as summer school band, to learn the new routine for the next year. i was a freshman so I played along. We all worked long hard hours out in the bright summer Florida sun, as it sapped each and every drop of strength we all had.

it really started to come together towards the end of summer, and once the summer program did end we all celebrated, especially the freshman. The Band support organization threw us a party in a local park to celebrate our work.

If you know Florida weather, during the summer it always rains in the afternoon, and today was no different. believe me it did rain. as the rain cascaded down, we all decided to have a lower classmen, meaning freshman and sophomores, versus upperclassmen football game in the rain.

And for the next hour we all played hard, no holds barred football, actually with the violence it was more closer to rugby. We all tackled, and clawed, as we played, remembering that it is a no holds barred game. But in the very end we lower classmen seized the day and won much to the chagrin of our parents, as we were no covered in about three inches of mud all over who had to do the laundry for the kids.

It was very popular with the kids, not so much with the organizers of the party. they did everything in their power to basically outlaw the game, of course to no avail. I loved it all four years of High school.

Dont know if they continued them afterwards or not. Considering how the younger classes behaved, being so uneventfull, I cant see how this did get carried on... sad really..

a new sig for me.
June 22, 2016 at 10:06am
June 22, 2016 at 10:06am
Day 1316: June 21,2016

Prompt: Use the following words in a story, poem, or essay: bash, backbone, ideal, damnation, crusher, details.

"I'm not here to bash you today," he said as the well dressed man stepped out from behind the podium.

A silence ran rampant through the auditorium as the man spoke.

"In fact," he continued," I'm here to find out who has the backbone to stand up for an ideal, in which he or she believes in."

Again, as before no sound was heard, just a bit of movement among the people in the audience out in the darkness before him.

"If you want to know the details of what I need you need to speak up," he stated.

The silence in the room was becoming annoying, as it was also becoming more then he could tolerate from someone. So this man started pacing back and forth across the stage, then slowly, after a bit, he stopped behind the microphone again and waited for something that just wouldn't come to him.

"Come on people!" he stated, his voice cutting through the silence like a hot knife through butter," its not like we are talking eternal damnation here."

The man stood there a second, as the silence was screaming at him, much like a rock crusher would at a rock mine. The man looked out into the darkness, and saw nothing and now one moving or saying anything. He placed his hands upon his hips before silently stomping off the stage.

"What a bunch of losers," he said to himself as he walked off the stage just like he came on.

a new sig for me.
June 15, 2016 at 12:04pm
June 15, 2016 at 12:04pm
Day 1308 June 14, 2016
Let's talk about first impressions. I read an article in Family Circle about the importance of your front door on your home. They say that your front door makes a lasting impression and says a lot about you the resident. Do you agree or disagree on it's importance? Do you feel it matters what the outside shows or is it more important to you what the inside reflects?

Well, I thought long and hard about this prompt today. And what popped into my head about it, and I feel a good example of this is me. Im a 48 year old 6'4" 372 lb man. I have been told I can be scary when I want to be. but yet very few people have come into my life for long enough to see that inside Im a soft and fluffy teddy bear. Most can not get by the exterior that is, I'll admit a bit rough, but is kept that way purposefully, for security reasons, as well as a test to find out who truly wants to know me, and who just wants to use me.

I do overall, agree with its importance, but disagree at the same time because it is usually used as a means of looking for greener pastures in other fields.

" you cant judge a book by the cover" is a popular phrase for this piece. I feel it really does fit. because it is the inside that make you who you are, that is unless you are shallow enough to only want the outside rather than the inside to direct who you are or who you know. This is truly just my own personal feelings and not scientific fact at any point.

a new sig for me.
June 14, 2016 at 11:57am
June 14, 2016 at 11:57am
Day 1308 June 14, 2016
Let's talk about first impressions. I read an article in Family Circle about the importance of your front door on your home. They say that your front door makes a lasting impression and says a lot about you the resident. Do you agree or disagree on it's importance? Do you feel it matters what the outside shows or is it more important to you what the inside reflects?

This subject actually hits home for me kind of hard, as it is me to a tee. I say that because I am handsome, but not model like.... I am smart but not nerd like.. I am not like any man you or anyone has ever met, and in this I am sure. With me I consoder myself a puzzel, because to get to the reall good stuff... you must get past the outside stuff.... it is the way I have been since high school... where I found very few people are willing to look past the outside to get to the tootsie roll center of the tootsie pop...

a new sig for me.
June 13, 2016 at 12:06pm
June 13, 2016 at 12:06pm
Day 1307: June 13, 2016
Prompt: Write about a scent you remember from your childhood. What aroma brings back pleasant memories when you smell it?

I think that the scent that brings back memories the best. is the smell of lobsters boiling in the pot... It brings me back to my childhood in the town of Lyman Maine... lots of fun up there... lots of fun exploring the woods, the old mill pond, blueberry picking, the seaside trolley museum, fetching water from the well two buckets at a time(yes it had no running water, electricity, or inside bathroom, a night mare to some but to me a joy)
a new sig for me.
June 8, 2016 at 5:34pm
June 8, 2016 at 5:34pm
Day 1302: June 8, 2016: Prompt write a story or poem about The Happy Crow.

I supposed to write about this bird,
who sits up on my window sill,
always taunting me with a few sounds from his pointed bill.
Now I know I'm just a nerd,
but running after this bird wont make it go away,
even if it does it would be back before the end of the day.

But this crow,
this demon in carnate,
who comes to taunt me into doing something.

this crow ,
this thing does know,
that he will never go,
Never leave this sill,
till he knows Ive given up.

then this crow, this happy crow,
who lands upon my window sill,
will start again once the next day arrives.

a new sig for me.
May 27, 2016 at 8:43am
May 27, 2016 at 8:43am
Day 1290 May 27, 2016
"It's much better to do good in a way that no one knows anything about it."~ Leo Tolstoy

What do you think Tolstoy meant when he wrote this? Do you agree or disagree?

I believe that he meant that you should be doing good, without claiming responsibility for it.... I think its called pride, or vanity. I whole heartedly agree with this, in fact it is the way, based on my religion, I should be going good for others, so I wont attract attention but the good is just done.

Bonus: if you guess what book this famous line is from, I'll put you in a raffle for a BCOF merit badge

answer is anna kerina

a new sig for me.

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