A blog about my struggles and victories as a mother with all boys.
I was thinking about creating an off-site blog but I thought, why? I wouldn't be getting input from people who know me or that I have a connection with. This is going to be my real attempt at blogging. |
A little about me and what this blog is about:
I am 33 years old and a mother of three boys and there is a lot of stress that comes with the job. And mess. And love . We live in a small town in Ohio and I love it. We visit big cities here and there and it's such a relief to come home to a place that is familiar. I have four siblings of my own and I am the oldest. My parents had four girls and on their last attempt had my brother. He is fifteen now and was diagnosed with autism at an early age. My mom always says he is her favorite and we can't complain about it .
I hope you enjoy my blog and feel free to share your parenting stories with me.
Me and my sons, Maxwell, Elijah, and Oliver
| ...So today I'm taking my dog to the vet. He has just been acting funny. I was so concerned all night then my little heathens woke me up at one in the morning and I was having anxiety over school starting and how I need to get little Oliver to the dentist, myself to the dentist, clean the house, and of course poor Shadow (the dog).
Today was a day I had to pep talk myself out of bed early enough I could have some time to myself to collect my thoughts before the boys wake up and bring their chaos cloud .
In all seriousness, I have goals this week and I'm determined to do them. I know it will make me feel better if I do, so ONWARD with the day, I will take it as it comes.
| This morning I headed downstairs to find my youngest (just turned 4) on the couch and a terrible smell coming from his general area. A little back story: he was diagnosed with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder) last year, he is not yet potty trained and he has no interest. Well, his diaper had somehow partially came off and there was poop. It was all up his back, on the blanket, on his legs and hands.
So, I cleaned that up and went into the kitchen where there was a big pile of dog puke.....then my dog hid (he's a male also.)
On the writing front, I did m first review in such a long time today. I felt it was detail and well executed. So happy.
I hope your day is poop and puke free!
| Today has started off promising. I got the motivation to clean up the boys room and throw out some old broken toys while they were sleeping. I'm sure they won't be missed....
While I was cleaning I was thinking heavily on how I was so inspired to write yesterday! I entered a contest, did a blog post, was just about bursting with creative energy and this morning I'm like, eh, what else can I do? So I cleaned. As I cleaned, however, I thought. Mostly about creativity.
Creativity: "the use of the imagination or original ideas, especially in the production of an artistic work".
Sure, I feel like if anyone can write a piece of work that captures the interest of the reader, it's creative. When specifically told to "be creative" I feel at a loss. What is creative? Alien invaders? A pregnant biological male? A new disease or plague that has a funny name? Is it being humorous in a time of severity?
Then I think, maybe being creative is too obvious. Maybe we should be, I don't know, normal? in our writing and then right when you least expect it, a twist at the end. Could you capture an audience and keep them enthralled till the end if you were predictable before throwing in your big twist?
I specifically didn't enter a contest today because I thought my idea wasn't original. I tend to think too much, to want to detail too much (or maybe too little). It's an odd thing, the writing process.
So, I suppose in conclusion of my random thoughts is that when doing some of the most mundane things, you may not come up with a novel idea (haha) but maybe the subplot.
Have you ever been struck by inspiration at a really horrible time, or lost it in a critical moment?
| Hello WDC! It has been a long time. I am now 33 years old and so much has happened. First off, my father passed away quite unexpectedly. It absolutely tore me apart. The process to go through his estate was daunting and since he had no will, it was a mess. I suppose we were fortunate to not have much as it is. Dad's house was foreclosed on and bought back by the bank, he did have a couple life insurance policies that ended up paying for the funeral and attorney fees (luckily). As for cause of death, he had a massive heart attack and died while I was in the hospital 100 miles away with my son who was having seizures. Its odd how I can remember everything that happened that day, but perhaps that story should be told at a better time.
After that traumatizing event, another occurred. My mother overdosed on heroin. She had dabbled in pain pills before but promised she had it under control. Never being a drug addict myself I thought "sure, makes sense. People take these things all the time legally." It was a hard road. She did recover and went into a drug program that she just recently graduated out of. I would joke after the fact that us five kids would have been orphans in less than two years. My brother is still a minor.
I have the same job I love, it's been 5 years and I work part-time. About as part-time as you can get. I work about 15-17 hours a week. Worth it. Through the COVID pandemic, we got hazard pay and my husbands job didn't suffer too much. We are fortunate.
My boys are now 8, 7, and 4. My little one just having his birthday on Wednesday. He has been formerly diagnosed as autistic. He hates masks, they scare him. I worry about school and life and everything going on right now. Since we live in Ohio masks are mandatory everywhere but I think some people would be surprised how many people don't wear them. I don't necessarily believe masks do much good but I wear one just in case I'm wrong (I have been before).
Life gives us inspiration from everywhere. I have a lot of writing to get out, it will make me sleep better at night.
Love and health to all,
| Let me start off by saying, I have never been a thin person. I was in sports in school and was heavy, I was in college and taking diet pills, I wasn't as heavy but still not healthy. When I had Oliver, I stepped out of the shower and looked at myself in the mirror and almost cried. I was heavier then ever and while I had just had a baby it was an excuse.
I contacted someone who sells Herbalife and I got started on a three day trial pack and lost three pounds in three days. I lost seven pounds the next week. This was in February. Since then, I have lost 27 pounds total.
I do all kinds of fun things now that I wouldn't have thought about ten months ago. I do cardio drumming, fit camp, run! I run! I never ran. I have done a mud run, a have done just a straight 5k, raising money for good causes while getting healthy. I have also found that working out gives me an amazing start to my day and makes me feel good.
I am 30 years old and while I don't really have much medical issues I do have three kids I run after and a husband .
I just hope if someone else is struggling, I have inspired you to maybe try something new! You might be surprised!
If you want someone to talk to or some accountability, find me on Facebook or e-mail me here on WDC!
|Sorry I have been absent for some time but I have some updates on my three boys .
Maxwell, my oldest, will be heading to kindergarten in the fall. We just had screening a couple days ago and he did well.
Elijah, the middle, is quite independent and bull-headed. This is nothing I didn't know but it is really starting to show as he nears is 4th birthday.
Oliver, my baby , is now 9 months old! I wonder where the time goes. He is standing but not yet walking, crawls all over the place, and is making me smile every day.
Here is a couple of updated photos. My sweet boys
Mommy, Maxwell, Elijah Oliver
| Oliver has his first fever . Last night was pretty rough since he has a stuffy nose, cough, and he was so warm. He would nurse and it would sound so hard hearing his breathing through snotty nostrils. Sleeping peacefully now, I'm waiting for the doctors office to open so I can get him in today.
It never gets any easier. I know the drill; fluids, lukewarm baths and/or sponge baths, baby Tylenol. But what if? What if it's something more serious that needs medical attention? I took him to the E.R. for the first time a month ago because I was having a freak out that he was possibly suffering from whooping cough.
It's a rainy, gloomy day here anyway. Storming all through the night. I'm not sure how much sleep I got but it wasn't much. A friend of ours is staying nights with us since his wife left him and his father died all within a couple days of each other. I'm sure it's a combination of all things the storm, sick baby, guest, that made it hard to sleep. One time when Oliver woke up I changed his diaper and he peed on me .
I am happy the two older boys had school today so I can focus on helping my little man get better. He turned 6 months old a couple days ago and it's amazing how fast they grow
| Today I pat myself on the back for not yelling at my son for spilling his juice....again. Am I proud for not losing my cool? Sure. Am I proud that I am proud I did't lose my cool? Not so much. As one could imagine, my life is pretty hectic. Not a lot of me time. So, when the baby is sleeping and I say 20+ times to be quiet then finally snap when he wakes up is it a natural response to be mad? Sure, but there is no reason for me to flip out.
Seriously, my kids must think I'm crazy.
I could have had them color, or do a puzzle, or work on speech, or something. What do I let them do while Oliver is sleeping? Play Jurassic World. They are on the same team but they fight over who gets to be what person or who gets to do a certain quest or whatever the situation is that they yell at each other.
This morning was semi-productive. I made coffee . I washed dishes . I fed everyone (that's a chore) . I even cleaned up toys that my boys 'helped' me with. Now I am wondering should I fold laundry? Nah, the baby is up and I have to leave the house in an hour and a half. Oh the joys of motherhood
| So my husband likes to play Call of Duty from time to time on the x-box and my children like to watch and always beg him to play. Now I'm not so against video games and giving kids fake guns because we don't have guns. There is 0% chance of them getting one in my house. Scott's father does have them but always has them in his safe so I'm not concerned. Anyway, they do like to play Minecraft. I let them play on creative setting and it's amazing what a five and three year old can come up with. There is one downfall to this.
The language. My young sons should not be saying 'fuck' and 'hell' and 'you stupid idiot'.
My husband thought it was funny at first "Oh my gosh, where did they learn that?"
I will tell you where they learned it. Probably from your potty mouth! I know I may not have the cleanest mouth but I would never curse until I met him. I was a pretty straight shooter if you ask me.
So, I had to be the one to put my foot down. My husband and I work opposite shifts so we rarely co-parent and half the time we are not on the same page when it comes to bed time and discipline which is becoming a problem. So, I now have to make a set of rules and a schedule for when I am not home. Kids need consistency. If there is one thing I would offer a new parent advice wise, it's to develop a routine. This will keep your children from getting out of line (for the most part). I suppose I would be considered a 'free range' parent but right now, it's not working. Yes it's a lot easier with a 5 month old to just feed them when they are hungry and find something for them to do that will occupy an hour or two but it's not healthy for them. It's not healthy physically, mentally, or socially. Elijah does great in school, he acts out at home. Is this because he feels he needs to compete for attention? Because he is the middle child and things like this happen? Because he doesn't have a routine at home? Yeah. Any of those are very plausible reasons at why my second oldest son acts out.
Right now as I am typing this post they are playing video games and the baby is in his walker but you know what? They woke up, had breakfast, did some free play, had lunch, we all sat together and played with this cool airbrush thing they got for Christmas, and now since they have been good, get some video game time. Tonight their cousins (my sister and her daughters) will be coming over so they can all run around the house and get some energy out then dinner, bath, free play, and bed.
If you think it's too late, it's not. At five years old Maxwell will start following a schedule, at 3 years old Eli will, at 5 months old Oliver will. And at 30 years old so will my husband. It will make life easier and cause less stress. Here's hoping all goes well.
|This year I am going to make sure is a memorable one. Every year goes by so quickly without doing everything I want to do. Sure with three children it is hard to do, but very possible.
First on my list of to-dos is a "Good Week" Jar I saw on my facebook page. You take a jar and some pieces of paper and at the end of every week write down something good that has happened. On New Years Eve you read about what a great year you had! That would surely make the beginning of the next one start on a positive note. Don't dwell on the bad, but the good.
Second, take some more time for me. My husband has no problem doing this and left me tell you, mama needs some R&R. I need time to write, to hang out with my friend I feel I neglect, to do stuff that makes me happy and feel good.
Third, I want to get in shape. This isn't about wanting to impress anyone, to be 'hot', it's about good health and good self-esteem. Also, I have a gym membership that gets paid and rarely used.
So, for 2017 there is a lot to do! But I want to cherish it, hold it in and never let it go. Time goes by so fast it's hard to think in a few short weeks I will be 30 years old, my oldest son will be 6, my second 4, my baby 1. I am happy to be alive and hope to prove it this year.
I would love to hear from you all! What do you hope for this year?