So, I realised after the fact that I submitted my short story incorrectly, but the contest isn't really what I wrote it for. I have been having issues with writing since finishing my most recent novella - the words were not working, and none of my current ideas have been inspiring enough. It has been incredibly difficult to even look at a blank page for something other than fiction - I have numerous papers to write for classes, but I cannot focus long enough to read the material, let alone craft an intelligent paper. Writing the short story for the "What a Character!" contest was a blast, and I am so proud of myself for actually writing something. I cannot tell if I will be inspired enough to write an actual novella again until November (because I don't care how much writer's block I have, I WILL be participating in NaNoWriMo this year), but I will happily continue to write one-off short stories for now.
It has been far too long since I was on here last. I hope to make a habit of being here more often, as this is the best writing community available on the internet, and I have established a presence here, even if it is a small one.
I am procrastinating again. Nearly finished with the first round of edits on The Twilight Garden, and I just can't seem to stick with it. I've fleshed out the tale quite a bit, but now that I am so close to the end I just want to stop. I don't want to finish it. Why is that? Do I fear rejection? Am I concerned that no one will enjoy it, therefore I feel it necessary to keep the unfinished manuscript to myself? I've already posted it here and on Wattpad, so it isn't a fear of rejection or wanting to keep it to myself--so, what the hell is wrong with me!?
I honestly think it is just because I am overwhelmed with the entire process. I've spent so much time working on this project, and now I see that I am not quite as close to publication as I thought. There are things to be edited, scenes to build up, characters to work on. So much more effort needs to be put into this, and with my changing circumstances, I am feeling stretched too thin.
I use my writing as a means of balance, it is how I keep myself sane. How will I ever find the time for this between a full-time day job and being a single parent? Are there any single parents who work 40+ hours a week here? I don't know how I am going to finish this tedious process of edit, revise, edit, revise. Lord knows I have very little patience, and I want things to come to me quickly, though I know that these things take time.
I am not complaining at all--I am incredibly nervous about starting work on Monday, due to certain circumstances that seem to be unavoidable, and I am feeling vulnerable right now.
Back to editing. I can't keep procrastinating like this.
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