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Please follow an ASR rating.*
Happy 1st WDC anniversary!!!
see above.


Congratulations!
This is the beginning of a success story that will
continue for many more years. Happy 1st Anniversary.
Kindest Regards, Lilli
"Eliminate filter words and phrases

In action-writing, filter words and phrases are the first to cut. When we read 'She heard that someone was knocking urgently on the door' we lose urgency. It's a beginning author's mistake, to continuously signal to the reader who the viewpoint character is that is doing the hearing or seeing. In this case, we could simply write 'Someone was knocking urgently on the door', or, better still, 'A sudden, urgent hammering on the door'.

Find words that distance your reader from the scene ('she saw that', 'he felt that'). Cut them. Just show the thing itself ('It was wrong of her' rather than 'he felt that it was wrong of her', if 'he' is the current viewpoint character). "

-- Excerpt from Bridget at Now Novel


This is something I'm working on with my writing. I struggle with this. Any tips or suggestions?
Also, what's something you're working on to improve your writing.
I know. The "that" is my security blanket. Sure, I don't need it, but I really like it. It makes some sentences feel more comfortable to me. I've started watching my "that"s and tend to leave a few in for my own sanity, but I've been working on cutting most of them out.

I will say this. I have found that (<--HA!) cutting some of them out has forced me to restructure some sentences, and sometimes I like the new sentence better. I'm still learning how to cope with it, though.
Yes, filter words -- in any kind of narrative -- are telling, and are redundant filler, and should be cut -- whether urgency is a concern or not.

Tip: Make a list of such words, use browser find to locate them in your text, and rewrite to remove them. Then read through looking for others (and add those to your list). In other words, don't strain your brain finding them; save the brainpower for fixing them.

However --

we could simply write 'Someone was knocking urgently on the door', or, better still, 'A sudden, urgent hammering on the door'.

Neither of those are a good example of how to rewrite it. It's still wordy. The was -ing verb tense is usually unnecessary. Urgently is an -ly adverb. Sudden and urgent are telling and redundant. Hammering suggests the knocker is using a hammer.

'It was wrong of her' rather than 'he felt that it was wrong of her'

The it/there be-verb construction is usually filler. The pronoun is buried in a preposition. The information is just: she was wrong. The be verb (in the information version) flags the info as something to integrate into an action clause, rather than leaving it as the main non-event in a static clause.

Tip: Don't take the examples in blog content as examples of good writing. Although they try to fix the error they're talking about, the rewritten example usually breaks one or more other writing guidelines. Always ask yourself what else is wrong with it.

I might rewrite her problem examples like this:

Pounding on the door [startled|alarmed] her.

She shouldn't ___.
  (his direct thought about the negative consequences or side effects of a previously narrated action = why she's wrong)

Also --

It's a beginning author's mistake, to continuously signal to the reader who the viewpoint character is that is doing the hearing or seeing.

That sentence is convoluted, awkward, overloaded and incorrectly punctuated. The badly written explanation flags the writer as someone who is still a novice. ... "If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough." -- Albert Einstein.

Suggestion: Do yourself a favor: Find a better teacher, one whose explanations are clear and easy to understand. Check out the blogs of publishing industry professionals whose content focuses on how to write.
Oh, and the THAT problem? Sometimes it should stay in, and that's a fact, but in these cases, it sounds "off" because you're not taking out enough:

"He could see THAT She was struggling..."
"She knew THAT It would take more..."
I have found that (<--HA!) Cutting some of them out has forced me to restructure some sentences, and sometimes I like the new sentence better.

It's My Anniversary!!!



Congrats to you!




Happy Anniversary, Dominique!!!
*Cake**Balloonp* Happy Happy Anniversary wishes! *Wand*
Are you coming to party with us and we with you at POWER? *Laugh**Cupcakev*
I will indeed come party!
Just thought I would leave you a note here too. I placed a longer message in your guest book. "Happy August Anniversary here at WdC."
Thank you very much! It has been a great year!
I've added a new entry to my book, "Dominique's Blog:
         "Envision Your Future
Milestone:
July 2, 2019

Dominique stopped being stubborn and decided to use her brain and switch from Microsoft Edge to Chrome.

Note to self: feeling dumb, soooo much faster
Don't feel dumb! It's not like Google is without its own flaws.

I switch between Chrome and Firefox and both annoy me on a regular basis *Rolling*
 Passive Income  (E)
Proven ways to start your home-based business
#2193954 by Dominique


I would greatly appreciate if people would review my E-book. I don't want to self publish for the first time without a ton of advice.

Thank you!
I posted the wrong file, sorry guys {embarrased face palm}
Hello writing family,
thank you everyone who posted birthday love. I appreciate it! As a 29-year old mother, I don't exactly traditionally 'celebrate' anymore, so the birthday wishes are much appreciated! BUT what you didn't know is... today was also my
2-year clean day!
For those of you who know me on here, you know how hard I work towards keeping that and today, I have 2 birthdays! It's almost like a re-birth. Today was very special to me, so I'm glad I could share it with all of you guys since you have become my writing family!
xoxo

Two years?! Woohoo!
A perfect time to reflect on the peace within,
to continue to hope, and to accept the many blessing of recovery!

Wishing you continued growth in your recovery as you celebrate your second year!

*Heartv* Congratulations! *Heartv*
Hugs, Lilli
Admiration and blessings
Dominique
For your strenth and will to overcome.
Happy Birthday also
blessings and prayers for your lovely family
*Hug1**hug**Hug2*
*Heart* Birthday
Plenty to celebrate there, Dominique. Congratulations and happy birthday. *Heart*