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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/jerseyknight
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574 Public Reviews Given
576 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of The Run  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I liked how you were able to keep my attention while writing about this woman's horrible life.
I think it is hard to write about such tragic circumstances and keep the reader hooked. I like how in paragraph 6 you have her getting revenge. You did a great job on this.
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Review of Taboo Questions  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Polygamy makes men happier then women. I have ancestors that were polygamists and the women all fought with each other.
It lead to a very bitter environment.

There obviously should be means testing to qualify for welfare. There are some people who probably should get it longer than others.

When you get older and if you are not then in a relationship, you might then find a huge lonely void in your life if you do not have children.

An 18 yr old and a 19 year old should be able to get married in my opinion. Where they should or not is their decision.
I like your opinion survey.
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Review of Greater Good  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I like how you bring the readers personal philosophy into the story. I like how the bright clouds and the golden gates are over there and the story teller is over on the bright clouds. Without preaching you show how it is the readers choice to go through the gates, be left on the clouds or be maybe be left with nothing at all. If one does not believe.

Great Nonpreaching, but got the message across story.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)

Alone on the streets of Mumbai. Now he will have to steal someone else's cell phone to be able to get off the streets.
How cold and hard that person was. He tried and had such a good heart trying to help the old woman. It is like he was thrown away.

The only problem I saw with the story is that you have the person walking down the road while using a stationary phone booth.

“Arey, I’m not deaf! Who are you bhaisaheb?” Mamaji walked briskly along the road, as he spoke into the phone.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Music can be so healing and peaceful. I tried to look up Shiloh, but did not find anything.
My favorite is Magnificent Void by Steve Roach.
Have you heard of heartsofspace.com? It is free on Sundays. It is an ambient space music website that at times plays music for Isis.
I enjoyed reading this and knowing that other people feel the same way I do.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
The concert started out so prim and proper it was unimaginable that something could go wrong.
The old Maestro reeked havoc trying to get revenge. What a sore loser!
This was an excellent story. I saw nothing that needed changing or improving, it was just great as is.
Good Job!
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)

That was a surprising, hair raising ending!
I am not going to ever be able to read another ghost story without thinking of this one.
That was quiet haunting!

I found this one group of sentences awkward. It might be possible to combine them and have it easier to read.
I begged them for some time; only really special cases. It stopped. You must be one of the ‘special’ cases.”

Great Job!
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Review of Self Made Prison  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a well written description of depression. You show the hopelessness, despair, but you also go on to show how difficult it is for a person who is depressed to see anything positive.
This is a great example of how depression creates this whirlwind feeling and the sensation of sinking deeper where it is hard to get out.

Some days it is difficult to wake up early in the morning, throw open the curtains, stretch your arms to the ceiling and smile, but if we force ourselves the heavy weight gradually lifts and we can truly enjoy the morning.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
It seems you have had a hard road and are seeing your way through it. Writing is an excellent part in the recovery process.
I find your writing to be rushed. You have so much to share, but say it all so quickly. You might benefit from just making things longer.
I thought that this at first was a biographical piece, but then discovered that the mental hospital was closed down when you said you were there. Either biographical or fictional this was well written.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
It is good to know that most people are seeing things the same as I do. What I do not understand is why so many people stated Bill Clinton when the economy was so good then.
I just do not understand what they think makes a good president. It would be interesting to know why they feel he was a bad president.
Great Poll!
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Review of FOREVER  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
WOW
This is INCREDIBLE!
I loved how the beginning sounded like a classic. Not being well read I am not knowlegable enough to know who to compare it to except Kahil kabran. It had that rhythmic not verse but intelligence that leaves one feeling WOWED
The ending was a total surprise.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This truly is love.
You are an excellent writer.
This is a relaxing feel good read.

I love this quote from your father: ""Son, marriage is like a job. It is also probably the hardest job you will ever have in your life. The one difference between a job and a marriage is that with marriage, you never get to retire."

Excellent!
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Well you certainly feel open to share your opinions and have opened your self up for cricticsm by asking for it::
In the first stanza you bash the President without reason
Second stanza is more of the same.
the third was no less offensive
by the forth you have continue to criticise without offering anything to back it up.
To come across as not just a complainer it helps to have actual things to complain against.
Here it just came across as complaining.

I do like how your poem was written, however. It is in great form.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Marylin's love is killed in war and then she longs for his cousin then falls for Sir Robert. I liked reading this story because of the way it was told. It was a great story describing what life and romance was like back in the 1940's in Ireland.
It was a relief that after loosing her husband and daughter she once again found romance and is enjoying life.
Good Story!
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
William Conrad Chesterton is a seven year old who is being severely beaten and is in a terrible living situation. This is a well written tragedy that ends with hope for the future. My heart feels for this little kid. How can he turn the situation around? I hope you write more to this story.
excellent job!
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Review of DADDY'S SHOTGUN  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Merry Christmas!

I read this to see how a good writer does a hostage scene, as I seem to have a bit of problem with mine.
You keep the story going instead of drawing all that was said and how long and intense it was.
I like how the story is short and ends on a positive.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
AND! You have written a good suspensul story. So does it turn out to be Peggy the hairy man from Russia like on the TV commericial, it is a rommance story, so probably will not be jack the ripper.
You have a good writing style that makes this a joy to read.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I do not have enough information to make that decision. Did she do it on purpose?
Is this a mean, vindictive person who is trying to assert her power? If this was an
accident then yes by all means I would still think highly of the person and think they
are beautiful.
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Review of In Comes the Wind  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Carolina a quet girl meets a new male co-worker, Colton, and is starting to fall for him.
This is a short piece to what would make a great book. This is a light easy read.
This is well written. The only improvement that could be made in my opinion is that you could continue on with the story.

This was enjoyable.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

I found this on the review me list.
I am finding that this requires some historical knowledge to read. I am
not very knowledgeble about the subject and would not change anything
based on my opinion because I am not that great of a reader or writer....
I did not understand the word: mon
A report, mon general’
I saw on pbs a show about how the military formations have changed over time in history.
I am left wondering the meaning of this sentence:
"When they arrive, we’ll have to form square or die." Is he telling them that they need to surround them in a square formation, or form a square and walk towards with guns pointed?

‘’ We’re somewhere near the border sir! ‘’ Choinburnt replied. He was one of the last surviving scout of the regiment and Gulliemont had no choice but to depend on him for directions. It had been well known that he was a good director and on many occasions had led regiments back to the army, only the Russian Campaign proved disastrous for him, so far not a single regiment had surivied because of him. This was his last regiment to lead back before he would be posted to Toulouse, where the English were attacking.

I like the direction of the story how the guide has a history of leading everyone to death and they are suppose to trust him.
This is well written and I do not see anything that needs to be changed (in my uneducated opinion)
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (3.0)
I think that the "Vanity publishers" are individual people that sign up for membership and advertise their services.
I do not think that it is Writing.com's intention to advertise them over other publishing options.
It is my understanding that smashwords and other e-pub do not advertise.
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Review of Seventh Seal  Open in new Window.
for entry "Brownstones" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
A man wanted to tell 2 women about a story from Vietnam and ends up turning into Satan.
It does seem at times that people are only out to take advantage of others (especially if one is always at the receiving end).
I like how the story turned into something I totally did not expect.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This song has a lot of Christmas Cheer
It would be nice if all the year was like Christmas
without greed and if we helped those in need.

"Let’s put back the clock to a Christmas
That is not ever governed by greed
Where love is never shattered like glass
And we don’t turn our backs on those in need.

No we never turn our backs on those in need."

This is well written!
Great job!
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Review of The Book  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
How true this is!
Well written. IT is as if you know me!
This is a great poem that describes the life of a writter.
I enjoyed this.
I saw nothing to fix or repair. This is smooth and ready for
publication in my opinion.
I look forward to reading more of your writings.
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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Sounds like a long distant relationship that could actually move forward. I did not catch if this was fiction or real. It sounds like it could be either way. I am interested in knowing more about. Is there another chapter?
This is well written, and i wish the best for them.

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