Sonali, I could not have had more pleasure from reading your poem than if you had given me a hundred year old port. My deepest thanks for a viscerally satisfying existential drink. Well done.
First, there is a universal quality about remembrance of childhood. It is its intensity. You have captured that very successfully. I have a vivid picture in my mind of those childhood moments.
Second, the detail with which you introduce the street re-enforces that intensity nicely. And the reader wants to remember with you.
Third, if you are going to keep the piece in the present tense, you must introduce it in a way that takes you from past to present, in the way a film does through flash back.
Fourth, watch your singular/plural verb agreements as per is/are. Run the sentence using personal pronouns rather than names and it will be more obvious. It is easier to make a mistake if you use apostrophe s for foreshortening.
Regards Christopher 'Kiffit' Nagle
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