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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/queenofice14
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3 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Review by Ella Mal
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey Blanchovies! I'm super excited about how this story'll turn out! I like how you had the good and mostly bad parts of being Leon, and how his mother could sometimes be an actual mother, but would most of the time be a demon. His mother's death, even though he wasn't crying, it affected him deep down, more than he would care to admit.
Review by Ella Mal
Rated: E | (4.5)
Once upon a time, there was a young princess named Petunia. She was one of the, maybe the most, beautiful and kindest princess in all the lands. Her most stunning feature was her eyes; they were an unusual hot amber color that could look deep inside you. Everyday, she would play with the animals in the neighboring forests. But one day, a young man saw her from afar, and came up to her. He introduced himself as Marcos, and he was like a man of the night; with his dark hair and deep, dark eyes. He was extremely handsome, which made Petunia nervous just being around him. She excused herself hurriedly, and with a blush bright on her cheeks, she ran back to the castle.
Little did she know they would cross paths soon enough.
But a dark day soon came; the queen died, leaving the entire kingdom in sorrow, mourning her loss. The loss of her mother nearly broke Petunia, but at least she still had her father.
But soon, the king remarried. The step-queen was a beautiful woman, but her heart was cold and gnarled, especially towards Petunia. She turned her into a maid, and took all her fancy clothes, jewelry, and books. The king was unaware of this however, and soon had to leave for the war.
The step-queen had been jealous of the king's first wife, and saw her in Petunia. Because of this, as the days went by, the step-queen's hatred for Petunia grew, until she ordered Petunia's most precious item to be taken from her; her eyes. She then cast her out into the forest, and forbid any of the citizens to look for her; if they had her in their possession, they'd be put to death...
Petunia, with her sight gone, didn't know where to go. After two weeks, she had given up and laid herself out across the lush grass to die. She then heard a voice, and it took her but a moment to recognize the voice of the man she met long ago. Horrified, she tried to get up but could not find the strength to. She felt his rough hands caress her face as he whispered softly, with an edge in his voice, "Tell me who did this to you."
She couldn't find the strength to speak, and laid her head against his chest. he picked her up and carried her to his home.

The man turned out to be the newly crowned king of his kingdom, and he had been in love with Petunia since the day he first saw her at a banquet her mother and father had planned when she was younger. The people of his kingdom didn't want him to marry Petunia, but his mind wouldn't be changed. Petunia was afraid he wouldn't love her once he actually got to know her, and cried when she felt him put the ring on her finger. After they were officially wed, it was their night of consummation. She was still very shy about letting him touch her in that way. He comforted and assured her that she shouldn't feel nervous, until finally, she let him in.
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