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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/rockysavannah
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Review by rockysavannah
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
This is an amazing interactive with dozens of stories that portray fictional female characters like real children: cute, kind, innocent, but sometimes mischievous. Although there are many characters in these stories that I'm not familiar with, the ones that I am are written very well and maintain there personalities. Additionally, being an eructophiliac, I enjoy the large amount of belching that occurs in many of these stories, and the reaction that some of the ladies have who probably wouldn't normally do it. My only criticisms are that the chapters should be longer (about 40 sentences minimum, or the size of a typical college essay), there should be more spaces in between sentences & paragraphs to help the reader know whose talking & what's happening in the story, and there should be better punctuation to show where sentences begin & end, again, to help the reader know whose talking & what's happening in the story.
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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/rockysavannah