Writer's Cramp Review
Happy, happy morning!
Your Prompt was:
A young trick-or-treater is stuck in their costume!
First off, you successfully wrote to and therefore, have qualified for today’s Writer’s Cramp contest:
What I liked most about this piece was:You came up with an entirely new idea for a story! I hope you run with it. It sounds intriguing.
Further Corrections & comments: This was interesting, but it was all TELL. To SHOW a reader, you would need to describe through sensory. Of course, you, as the poet, have the option to write whatever and however you want, but I'd love to see some sensory here: For instance, instead of saying,"with shocked eyes," she gasps, she cries out, she whimpers at the sight, etc. When her mom took a deep breath, that was almost SHOW. I could tell the Mom had reservations about blurting out the tale. That gave us some insight into her feelings, but what was the girl feeling?
Anyway, just a suggestion about how you could start that story, if you choose to.
I am so glad I got to read this. Thank you for entering the Writer's Cramp. I hope you keep on writing and sharing your work!
Weekend Judge for the Writer's Cramp
S h a a r a
Please drop in to see my stories and poems. Or . . .
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for some of my witch tales, which I hope to one day turn into a novel.