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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/shyla-nicole
Review Requests: OFF
15 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (4.0)
I happen to believe by this that you are not a Christan. You say there is no proof of God, but the proof is everywhere ! In every person, thing, animal, and personality! I dont mean to preach to you, but i dont want to see you in hell. I hate to break it to you but that's where you will be if you don't believe in God.
I think the technical writing is good, that's what i rated you on, not the actual story line!
If you have any questions, or comments please email me back!! Happy writing!
~S~
2
2
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (4.5)
I love the first couple lines, they were descriptive and warm and just beginning of sort of a feel good poem! The rest is very descriptive and imaginative and nice to read! It was very unique and nice to read!
~S~
3
3
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (4.0)
I liked the chapter but seemed a little slow and boring. even as a slow story, a real one, i wish there was more suspense at the end. I also think you did a great job defining the charters!! Carmen defiantly has a personality and i cant wait to read more!! great work!!



~S~
4
4
Review of Daughter of mine  
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (5.0)
One day I dressed you, without your mom’s help.
I watched you play, wearing mismatched clothes, throughout the day.

That is one of my favorite lines in the poem!! It's comical, but emotional! I think you did a wonderful job expressing your feeling and how your daughter grew up!! It was really amazing!!


~S~
5
5
Review of Into the Up  
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (4.5)
I love the way you end it, sweet confusing, but still tells the whole story!


~S~
6
6
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (5.0)
I loved the story, not because of the death and sadness, but because you captured it so well. So many of us have lost someone we loved an d you captured every feeling people have going thru that situation.
My only suggestion would be that in the second paragraph you said: Frosty clouds. Smiling faces.
i would suggest combining them.
Frost clouds and smiling faces. although it is still a fragment it makes easier reading.
~ Love Shyla~
7
7
Review of To I at 15  
Review by Shyla
Rated: E | (4.5)
I think we would all like to send a message back to ourselves and stop us from a mistake we were about to make or a message about something we didn't expect. I loved the writing!




~ Love Shyla`
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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/shyla-nicole