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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/skittles9802
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Review by Skittles9802
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I really like the story! I hope you will like my suggestions. I just finished a writing class and I learned that the protagonist should have a flaw. What is the overall theme of the story? The antagonist should have a flaw he can not overcome, and be descriptive. What does she look like? What does the train station look like? When she runs into her friend, what's the backstory between them. Why does she greet him the way she did? I like the conversation but what is the dilemma besides the prostitution. You want to hook your readers in the very begin to root for your Protagonist. I am working on a novel, perhaps I will post it soon, and I have done many different story outlines. This way you get your ideas out, and then see if it flows. Picture yourself outside watching your story, what do you see? How does Michael stand, what does he look like? I hope this helps and best wishes. If you like I can assist as much as I can. Hugs
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