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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/vnaismith
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2 Public Reviews Given
2 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Vera Naismith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Interesting, but infodumpy. If you fleshed it out and worked the details in more subtly, it could be great.
2
2
Review by Vera Naismith Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
It seems too short. Whole paragraphs seem to be condensed into single sentences. I think that if you fleshed it out and expanded it, it would be great.

On the plus side, it's very atmospheric.
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