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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/xpatscot
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4 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Beyond Gone  
Review by XpatScot
Rated: | (5.0)
I am still learning how to navigate this site, and not very well it seems, because I reviewed your poem yesterday and my comment seems to have disappeared into the ether. If you have somehow received it, please forgive me for saying all this again.

First of all, I have to admit that I am not really a poetry person, so when I say that your poem made an impression on me that should be understood in the context that most poetry doesn't. What I particularly liked about it was how the sparseness of the writing complemented the starkness of the subject matter. I sensed a growing tone of desperation and of despair as the work developed. But the final like hit me like a punch in the gut and left me reeling. Such a powerful ending. Bravo !!!
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Review by XpatScot
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Wow! Very graphic. And what I mean by that is that you are able to create the scene right before my eyes so that I feel that I am there, watching the action unfold. And I like how you step the pace up when care is in the throes of her "possession" then calm it down again afterwards.Just one slight thing you might want to review - the tense you've used in the sentence that begins: "Mr Wilson had insisted that I visit the nurse, " All the previous action is already in the past and the use of "had" here suggests that this piece of action preceded it. But my reading is that the action you describe is in chronological sequence. Maybe you just need to drop the "had" here; but please ignore me if I have misunderstood your intent.
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Review of Sanctuary  
Review by XpatScot
Rated: E | (5.0)
Please forgive me if this review doesn't conform to the standards or expectations set on WDC. I am new to reviewing. In fact, this is my first review, ever. And while I know that I cannot go on using that as an excuse, that I must learn how to meet the standards and match the expectations, I hope you will make allowances for me this time.

I was totally convinced by the piece called "Sanctuary". So much so that I feel encouraged to go out (or in) and look for my own special place. I know that it won't be like yours and you probably wouldn't expect it to be; but that's not the point is it? Thank you for writing this. And thank you to whatever power or happenstance lead me to read it.
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