The tooth fairy wants a new job.
Bluebell The Flower Fairy.
Bluebell stretched and yawned as she woke, craving her early morning coffee and cigarette. Yesterday had been a busy shift, and she would probably feel better now if she had not visited the pub after work. She sat for a moment checking her memories of the night before, and sighed with relief as she recalled a relatively quiet time drinking with her girlfriends. No dwarves, no troublesome pixies and no giants encouraging her into drinking games or loud and rude songs. Today was the day of her interview, and stories travelled around Fairy Town faster than glitter from a cheap wand. Sometimes being a fairy really got on her nerves. It was alright for the dwarves to get drunk night after night, the pixies were always in trouble stealing and fighting, the giants could leave a trail of destruction a mile wide and she couldn't even swear without a warning and counselling.
Well she was going to show them all.
When Bluebell had left Fairy School the only job she could get was as a Tooth Fairy. The careers guidance officer had kindly explained that although the Fairy Council recognised her disability and would always try to help her to hold a positive role in society, swearing was really not acceptable for Flower Fairies. Bluebell couldn't help swearing, she really couldn't. Her mother had got on the wrong side of the Evil Witch in the Woods while she was pregnant and a swearing baby fairy had been the result. In the olden days it would have been called a curse, but in these modern times of political correctness Bluebell had been labelled with a disability and offered the only career where she had no reason to speak to the public.. They had given her an inexhaustible sack of pound coins, a pair of pliers and a wand of short term escape that would move her out of punching range if any clients woke early and angry as she did her job. But nobody had asked Bluebell if she wanted to be a tooth fairy. She was expected to be grateful to have a job at all, and relieved to have avoided the fate of other unemployed fairy kind, hanging around trying to get bit parts in nightmares, begging from her affluent friends and family and living in the back streets and gutters of Fairy Town.
Bluebell hated teeth, Smelly, Dirty, Slimy, Stinky teeth. She would rather have been responsible for warts, but that job was only available for witches, or housework maybe, but that position was reserved for brownies.
Last month she had been reading The Fairy Chronicles when she had seen a small advertisement.
A New Opportunity.
Bored with life?
Career in a rut?
Get out of the Gutters and Head for the Stars.
There had been nothing more than a phone number, but Bluebell had picked up her mobile and rung the number straight away. A bored drawl on the other end of the line had invited her to attend for an interview if she was interested in opportunities in Outer Space. When the swear words had stuttered out, she had apologised and explained the origin of her curse. There had been a short pause and then the drawler had laughed. “You needn't worry about that, love” he had said, “Out in space we have bigger things to worry about than a few swear words. I might have used a few myself you know, from time to time.” When she had asked for more information they had sent her a glossy pack, full of pictures of alien worlds and and glossy uniforms.
Well that settled that.
There were flowers on these alien worlds and the pamphlets specifically listed flower fairies as one of the proffered careers. Bluebell had applied for an interview and now today was the day. Today she could leave the world of fairy dentistry behind. Today she could start out on a career she had thought forever barred to her. At last she was going to be a Flower Fairy, just like her parents and grandparents before her. If it meant she would have to travel into outer space to make it happen, then that was a price she was happy to pay. She drank her breakfast coffee and carefully dressed in her smartest dress and wand.
Bluebell left her house singing and dancing as she flew to her interview, confident and hopeful for the first time in years. Now was her time. Now she was going to be a flower fairy.