A humble attempt to express what I feel for "her".
|I have searched for you so long that I have lost count of the number of days. I have been dying to meet you since how many days I don’t remember. I waited patiently for you thinking that someday you will also feel for me, the way I feel for you and come to my rescue. You see, I am suffocating, like a fish without water; I am shivering, like a dead leaf on a cold, windy night; I am falling, like a drop of water, all alone. Only you can rescue me. Only you can give me the air of love, the warmth of togetherness. But where are you? Alas! I can’t find you.
And yet, I can feel your presence around me. Like a breath of fresh air you fill my senses. Like a gentle breeze you touch me everywhere. The lingering feeling of the soft caress of your lips on mine, gives me goose pimples. The intoxicating perfume of your hair makes me go mad. I know you are watching me all the time with your wonderful eyes, with a playful smile on your face. I know you are taking care of me all the time like a mother takes care of her child. I know you give me the warmth whenever I feel cold. I know you never leave me alone. But then, why can’t I see you, why can’t I hold you within my arms?
I keep searching for you in my dreams too. Once I got lucky and found you. I spent an entire day with you. Only you and me, no one else to disturb us, no one else to tear us apart. I spoke to you like I had just found my voice; I kept on seeing you as if my eyes were only meant to see you. My lips became one with yours as if it was in their destiny to be together, forever. I spent the day, walking with you, holding hands. The brightness of your face was more glorious than the brightness of the Sun shining on top of us. I spent the evening, sitting beside you, holding you in my arms, watching the sunset over the horizon. You rested your head on my shoulders and fell asleep. And I kept looking at you wondering how worthless my life would be without you. It was the best day of my life. It was a heavenly, out-of-this-world experience. But then, I woke up. And I was heartbroken to find out that all of it was just a dream. The most wonderful dream I’ve ever had, but dream nevertheless. Tears rolled down the same eyes that had not tired watching you in the dream. I requested my eyes; I begged them, to tell me how you looked. But they paid no heed to my requests and refused to tell me anything. My shoulders refused to describe me the feeling of having made you fall asleep. My palms refused to tell me how it was like to hold you, to touch you. Only the heart didn’t betray me. It retained the feeling, the blissful feeling of having been loved madly by you. It may have been just a dream, but while it lasted, it was truer and dearer to me than anything else I have ever known in my life. Even today my heart has preserved that feeling, so that some day when I find you I can tell you how madly, deeply, insanely I love you. But when will I find you? Will I ever find you?
I want to make that dream come true. I want to spend my whole life with you. I want to see you, touch you, feel you. I want to spend every day of my life talking to you, never getting bored. I want to grow old with you, watching many sunsets together. I want to wipe your tears whenever you cry. I want to bring smile on your face whenever you feel sad. I want to give you direction whenever you feel lost. I want to give you strength whenever you feel weak. I want to give you rest whenever you feel tired. I want to make you feel like a woman. I want to love you.
I wish I found you, in flesh and bone. I wish you were here, with me right now, right at this moment.